A Paradoxical Life
by serpentilewitch
Summary: Rianna Le Fey wants nothing more than to be left alone in her House at Hogwarts, with her friend who doubles as a kid brother, Regulus Black. But a certain brother of said friend is making it somewhat difficult. Sirius BlackxOriginal Character
1. Strange Sortings

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Yes, I've done it again, yet ANOTHER fic! -sweatdrops- Erm, anyhow, this one is featuring Sirius Black and an original character. Oh, by the way, this fic was inspired by this picture from artdungeon(dot)net: http/www.artdungeon(dot)net/general/template.php?pblackbros Go check out the rest of her work, it rocks! Anywho, enough of the plugging, read on! Oh, and the name is pronounced "Ree-AH-nuh" And yes, term has only just started. It's the seventh year.

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**A Paradoxical Life  
****Chapter 1: Strange Sortings**

Rianna Le Fey wrapped her fingers around her mug of hot chocolate and sighed, staring into the delicious depths. It was raining outside, but inside the Hog's Head Inn, it was warm enough. And there wasn't anyone else, so she had her solitude. The other kids were probably over at the Three Broomsticks or someplace like that where it was bright and bustling and they could be all friendly with one another.

She sighed and turned her head to the left, the better to stare out of the window at the gray evening as raindrops splattered against the glass pane. She stirred her drink absently so that the chocolate wouldn't settle at the bottom while her other hand traced random designs into the rough, wooden tabletop. She was so much stranger than everyone else. And while no one pointed it out blatantly or indeed to her face, there always seemed to be a rift, particularly noticeable on days like this.

She was like a walking paradox, an unfunny jest, a sunny thunderstorm, a harmless tsunami, a Gryffindor in Slytherin. Feeling the twisting of her features in a scowl, Rianna thought back to that day six years ago when the wretched hat was placed on her head and she sat in the middle of the Great Hall, shivering slightly from the cold outside and wondering what would happen.

* * *

_"I see!" _the hat had exclaimed so that only she could hear. _"This is a shrewd one indeed! Are you brave enough to be in Gryffindor, then? Or cunning enough for Slythering? Which do you think, eh?" _Rianna had wondered whether her pigheadedness counted for actual bravery or not. The hat had chuckled at that and implored her to ask herself.

She'd never considered herself cunning, really. Or brave, for that matter. She was a firewitch, as she'd found out soon enough, and a direct descendant of the enchantress Morgan Le Fey. Firewitches were born, not made, rather like Metamorphmagi, and they tended to have rather fiery tempers. It was this temper of hers she'd learned to manipulate into either courage or cunning as the situation desired. As she mused, she came to the realization that even this little bit of manipulation was cunning in its own right, so maybe she really should be in Slytherin…

No sooner had she thought this, then the hat announced it to the Hall and the students at the table to the far right had cheered while most others had opted for polite applause. Some were jeering quite openly, but Rianna ignored them. She hadn't realized at the time that Slytherins had something of a reputation. She simply assumed it was a House like the others with special characteristics. This was, in essence, as it should be. But humans are imperfect creatures, after all is said and done.

* * *

So here she was, a sixteen year old girl possessing the disposition of a Gryffindor who was placed into Slytherin. Well, she'd be turning seventeen in little over six months, but that wasn't the issue, now, was it. The Gryffindors all scowled as she walked by in the halls because she was a Slytherin, and most of the Slytherins weren't sure she deserved to be in their midst. She wasn't scathing enough, she cared too much, and she wasn't showing the Gryffindors the proper amount of disdain.

Well, the last bit was rather hard for her to manage, seeing as how she was nearly a member of their scarlet and gold clad selves. And as far as putting on airs…she was never one for those. Shrugging and staring into the cracked tables she scolded herself for her incriminating thoughts. It wasn't all quite as bad as she made it out to sound.

She did have at least one friend. Admittedly, he was more like a kid brother, but that was fine with her. He found it amusing and entertaining when she was so vexed her hair started to catch on fire and its black color went from dark to flaming red and then literally burst into flames. It was an unconscious habit of firewitches that they couldn't control. Seeing him laugh usually made her grin and then she was no longer upset at whatever had gotten her started. He always acted as though he appreciated her kindness, so it worked both ways.

The door burst open and a sopping wet boy looking no older than twelve made his way in, a green and silver scarf tied around his neck, nearly choking him. He sloshed his way to Rianna's table and unloaded what looked like half of Honeydukes at her table, then grinned broadly. She laughed and loosed his scarf for him, motioning for him to take a seat.

"Reg! What're you doing here?" she asked him.

"Knew you'd be here somewhere, so I thought I'd bring you something!" Regulus Black replied, beaming and wiping his face. "Eat up, the stuff's great! Look, Bertie Bott's have added a ton of new flavors and here's a new thing they've come out with, Banshee Brownies. Go on, try everything." He watched her tentatively try a bean, make a face, and spit it out, laughing delightedly.

Her one purple eye and the other blue one (something she'd inherited from her great great great aunt, the enchantress) both eyed the Banshee Brownies suspiciously for a moment, then took a small nibble. Immediately, she winced as an ear piercing shriek was heard. Rianna clapped her hands over her ears and cringed, curling in on herself. She could feel her hair start to change color slowly and the ends were smoking already. Through the crack in her eyes, she saw Regulus roaring with laughter, slapping his thighs, thoroughly entertained. Not that she could hear him over the screaming.

A few seconds later, the nerve-grating sound ebbed away into the distance and shook her head to clear out her ears. Regulus was still chortling softly and she turned to glare at him. "Oi, you! How can you be laughing with that wailing scream echoing bloody murder?"

He grinned boyishly and informed her, "Only the person who's eating it can actually hear it." He tapped his temple. "It's all in your head." He was looking quite proud of himself at having foiled her into taking a bite, and she grinned at that, too. Her hair had settled down by now. Glancing out the window again and realizing the rain had let up slightly, the firewitch stood, gathering up the sweets and stuffing them in the pocket of her robes.

"Come on, Reg, let's get back before it starts pouring again."

He stuffed the remaining sweets in his pockets and looked at her quizzically. "I thought you said you liked the rain."

"I do, but it wouldn't do for us to get soaked to the bone on our way to the castle." She adjusted his scarf so it wouldn't strangle him. "Besides, you'll catch a cold if you're out in it too much."

He grumbled something about being mothered around all the time, but didn't complain as she lead the way out of the Inn and into the gale. It had indeed subsided somewhat, and the pair of them made a dash for the castle. Just as they reached the steps, it started pouring buckets again. "So much for not getting wet," she told Regulus, grinning and shouting to be heard over the storm.

They struggled up the steps right behind a group of students who had apparently had the same idea as they did. The group opened the door, glanced back at her, and before she could smile and accept the open door, it closed with a resounding thud. Rianna scowled and tugged at the door with all her might. As it started to open a little, something made it tug sharply shut again and she knew they were using magic to try and keep it closed.

Tugging with all her might, she staggered back as it became as easy as it should have been. The girl caught her balance quickly, however, and jammed a foot in the door way, grabbing Regulus by his robefront, she shoved him in before herself, then slipped in quickly, letting the door snap shut viciously behind her.

Breathing hard, she turned to glare at the group. The one with unruly black hair and glasses was pointing his wand at Regulus. Angrily, Rianna grabbed the back of the younger boy's robes and pulled him protectively behind herself. Turning to the bespectacled wizard, she said irritably, "Oi, you asinine imbecile, try picking on someone at least half your size, would you? And put the wand away, you look ridiculous."

The boy with brown hair to the right of the wand weilder turned quickly to hide his grin. The black haired boy to his left arched an eyebrow and came to stand next to him, sauntering and flanking him as though to say, "Come again?"

"You heard me," she said shortly, and made to stride out of the Entrance Hall. The two boys blocked their way. The brown haired one was off to the side, looking as though he wished his friends weren't doing what they were. Another boy that looked a bit like Regulus, only pudgier and with dirty blonde hair tugged at the second boy's robes and whispered, "She's a girl, Sirius, just forget it."

Sirius smirked and all but spat out, "She's a Slythe."

Rianna's eyes flashed. "And what?" she asked. "What does that say about me, the fact that I'm a Slytherin?" There was that temper again, she warned herself. It wouldn't be a good thing if she either fried the students or the school.

Sirius snarled. "It means you're filth and rotten to the core, is what!"

She'd figured out who he was now. It had been nagging her in the back of her mind since they'd run into the group. It was Sirius Black, older brother of Regulus Black, and held the chief in mischief. The others were undoubtedly James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew. It was easy to tell which was which. Rianna gazed at Sirius with a cool, level gaze, than slunk an arm protectively around Regulus.

She smirked slightly, the edges of her mouth curling up. "Play nice, now, Black," she said, eyes flashing in victory as Sirius's widened at the sight of Regulus, whom he hadn't noticed before. She felt Regulus huddle into her, not wanting to face his brother.

Rianna strode past the boys, this time, with no interference, and made it into the Great Hall. Halfway to their dormitory, Rianna pulled Regulus aside and whispered some advice to him. "Look, Reg, don't let him run all over you like that! You're every inch the man that he is, and then some, because you're not as stupid, cocky or immature as he is. Look him in the eye next time." She pointed to her own asymmetrically colored orbs. "Right here, aright?" He nodded, but she got the sense that he only wanted to get on to the dormitory and was saying whatever it took.

Sighing, she reached into her robes for a sweet and handed it to him as they made their way down the damp stone passageways, getting nearer and nearer to the dungeons. "There, now, he's just a bully. Eat that and we'll be at the common room in no time." Regulus took a huge bite of whatever was in his hand without looking, then cringed and winced as the banshee's shrieks filled his head. He glared at her through his squinted eyes and she laughed, then ran for it. Served him right, tricking her like that earlier.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I realized you all are beating me to update my other fics, but I just had to get this one out of my head. And Rianna's soo not a Mary-Sue, lol, score! Look, it's 6:46 in the morning! That says something of my inspiration, right? -puppy dog eyes- lol, please review it! -smiles- 


	2. Complete Dogs

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well, here's another chapter for you folks!

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**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 2: Complete Dogs**

Rianna yawned and stretched, sitting up in her warm four poster bed, listening to the early morning sounds as she sat in her nest of covers, the jade drapes still drawn across her bed. It wasn't even properly dawn yet. It had always been something of a habit for her to wake up at around this time, she wasn't sure what it was that made her do it, it just happened. She slipped out of bed and stood at the window, enjoying the crisp morning air and how it raised goose bumps on her bare arms. She had on a pair of velveteen, deep green pajama bottoms (A/N: yea, I got a thing for those, they're super cool!) but had ditched the matching tank top in regards to the weather. Instead, she had on a not-quite-snug t-shirt.

She cleaned herself up for the day and glanced at her reflection in the mirror over the sink. Her black hair fell around her shoulders in tousled disarray, but she didn't mind. Running a quick hand through it, she breathed in deeply, then crossed the dormitory to the door and let herself out, careful not to wake the others. Stepping lightly, she covered the stairs in a matter of seconds, crossed the somewhat chilly rectangular common room, not pausing to warm herself before the low fire. Letting herself out of the back of the mounted decorative shield emblazoned with a serpent which concealed the entrance to the Slytherin Common Room, she walked down the corridors of the empty castle.

Her fuzzy emerald slippers made no noise as she crossed the threshold and opened the gate. A stab of early morning sunlight hit the sky, tinting it orange with the promise of a new day. She smiled and closed her eyes, reveling in the warm feel of sunlight on her skin. Rianna sat on the steps and slipped off her slippers. Nothing like the feel of grass on your bare feet to make you feel five again! It was quite a wholesome feeling, and she didn't care who might see.

Her feet brushed through the dew wet grass aimlessly for a while, before turning towards the lake. She hadn't taken more than a few steps towards the water when she heard male voices laughing and talking. Rianna started slightly and turned sharply around. She could've sworn she was alone out here. There wasn't anyplace they could've hidden behind, except maybe the Womping Willow, and, well, that was never a safe bet.

The four approached the castle, unaware of the girl standing at the bottom of the steps, a ways from the castle. Sirius and James were in high good spirits, laughing and joking around. Peter was flushed and Rianna thought, quite assuredly, that they'd been up to no good. Remus looked the worse for wear, but there was a shy, happy grin on his face, too. She narrowed her eyes as they drew nearer, then made her way resolutely to her destination.

The movement of something white caught the corner of James' eye and he nudged Black, inclining his head in Rianna's direction. They broke into grins and jogged after her, purposely stumbling into her from either side. She gasped and fell forward, the unexpected shoves catching her off guard.

She stood and whirled around to glare at them hotly. She hadn't even _said_ anything to them! What were they pulling here! Here she was, trying to mind her own bloody business and they just come _wham! _out of nowhere, colliding into her and standing their like grinning idiots. She dusted her t-shirt off needlessly and straightened it, then tossed her head and looked up at them, eyes cold and distant.

"Excuse me," she said icily. "I wasn't watching where I was going." Then, giving them a contemptuous once-over, she turned on her heel and made her brisk way towards the lake. The beautiful morning had been marred by their presence, and it was apparent from Rianna's reddening hair that her temper was rising. She sighed. This was supposed to have been a good day.

Black kept pace with her, then moved to stand in front of her, his lip curled slightly and he sneered at her, doing almost as good a job of it as a Slytherin. She thought her housemates might be rather proud of it. "Haven't got your bait on you now, have you?" he asked her triumphantly.

She gave him a blank look, although she had a good notion what he was on about. "Excuse me?"

"You know who I'm talking about," he said quietly, taking a step closer. Rianna stood her ground, still staring coldly up at him. If he thought he could intimidate her, he had another thing coming.

"I realize you're a complete _dog_, Black, however, that doesn't mean I've got meat in my pockets for you every time you come calling," she said irritably.

They found this uproariously funny and even Remus couldn't keep from laughing out loud. Black's eyes dripped amusement at her innocently flustered and irritated face, although she tried to hide most of her irritation.

"A dog, am I?" he asked, smirking and thoroughly enjoying himself. He crossed his arms over his chest and cocked his head, grinning as though Christmas had come early and he'd gotten everything on his wishlist.

Rianna pursed her lips tightly, trying to refrain from doing anything rash. She conjured a bone in midair and tossed it over her shoulder. "Fetch," she said shortly, then strode on past the four, heading to the lake. Their little joke so satiated their lust for entertainment that they didn't bother following her to the lake, although she could hear their laughter half of the way down to it.

She sighed and threw herself down at the edge of the water and gazed into the still surface, her reflection wavering slightly. She wasn't really thinking of anything particular as she flipped onto her back and stared at the lightening sky. The mauve shade of it was so calming and peaceful… Rianna closed her eyes and let a slow smile cross her lips. Ahhh…what she wouldn't give for this sort of utter peace and serenity every day…

The rising heat on her eyelids let her know the sun was making its steady progress across the sky and it would be time for breakfast soon enough. Rolling over slightly, she groaned and managed to get herself up before she got so lazy she just lay there and roasted away in the sun. Giving herself a short dusting, she made her way to the castle, where she shoved her feet into the slippers she'd discarded earlier and headed into the Entrance Hall. The girl debated for a while on whether to change or not, but in the end, opted to stay in her comfy sleeping clothes, seeing as it was a Saturday and all.

Walking through the double doors of the Entrance Hall, Rianna scanned the Slytherin table, indifferent to the few curious and other interested glances in her direction from the various House tables. There, she'd found who she was looking for. A slight crease formed on her brow as she realized that someone was trying to start something with Regulus again. Seriously, why didn't they just leave him alone? She had a mind to go there and let the bully know _just_ how many hexes and jinxes she'd perfected, but knew she couldn't keep sticking up for Reg all the time. He'd have to do that himself every now and then as well…

She made her way to where he was sitting, smiling in greeting. A sixth year that was sitting next to him was looking up at her with an incredulous look in his eyes. The sixth year's friend who was sitting across from him was saying in an excited whisper, "She totally digs you, mate!" Rianna hadn't heard, nor cared, really, but when she reached Regulus, she turned to the sixth year and said, quite politely, "Budge up, would you please?" and promptly took the seat next to her friend.

Turning her back on the beet red sixth year, she faced Regulus, careful not to look at Lucius, who was apparently trying to shake the boy up with his steely gaze. "How's my little Reggie-Weggie doing today?" she asked, ruffling his hair affectionately. Regulus looked into his bowl of oatmeal and smiled slightly, although she could see his eyes were close to tears. Acting as though she didn't care or take note of this, the older girl piped up, "Oi, Luce! Pass me a roll or summit, would you? I'm starving!"

The blonde youth stiffened at being addressed as "Luce", but handed Rianna the basket of bread rolls nonetheless. She smiled. "Thanks! Oh, and, there's a jar of jam right next to your elbow there- no, the other one. Behind that- no- yea, that one. Thank you," She took the jar of strawberry preserves off his hands and continued. "Can I get that pitcher of pumpkin juice?" A scowling Lucius handed Rianna the flagon of pumpkin juice. "And a goblet? You can't expect me to drink out of the jug, now, can you?" She grinned at him, but his disdain only grew. Slapping down a goblet, he stood up swiftly.

"I'm not your bloody house elf, Fey, and I don't expect to be treated like one." His stiff form swept away from the table and off to some other part of the castle. Rianna stared. Turning to Regulus, she asked, "What's gotten into _him_?" then shrugged, unperturbed, and set about jamming up her bread roll while the boy she'd long since come to regard as a kid brother chuckled softly.

"Thanks," he whispered.

Rianna waved the knife she was using to spread the jam on her bread carelessly. "Meh, I was hungry- and lazy, and Lucius' seat was right next to all the food. It's just our good luck he left us to a peaceful meal. By the way, what did he want from you?" She bit into the sweetened food and chewed, waiting to hear an explanation of sorts.

"Oh, er, not much…" Regulus trailed off.

"Was it galleons again?"

Regulus stared sullenly into his cereal, but didn't say anything. Rianna pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes again. "Reg, next time he asks you for one, I want you to fish one out of your pocket, toss up the back of his robes, and shove it up his-"

Regulus laughed out loud, as did Rianna. The mental image was rather…ahem. They settled down in a few seconds, unaware that their outburst had caused a certain number of Gryffindors to glance at their table. Four Gryffs, to be exact. Rianna grinned and swung an arm around Regulus' neck, squeezing him in a half-hug, then kissing his cheek. She watched in amusement as he turned quite red. "Finish your cereal, you're starting to look emaciated," she informed him.

He moved his spoon around in the food half heartedly. "I'm not really hungry."

"Nonsense. Put some sugar in it."

"I already have."

"Put more."

"There's already too much."

"Strawberries."

"Ewww, I don't like those!" The second year wrinkled his nose while the seventh year rolled her eyes. Plopping in a few of the red, succulent berries, she bade him try the food _now._ He nibbled tentatively at the end of one of the strawberries, and slowly took a bigger nibble. She grinned, knowing he was liking it. "I like bananas better," he said, as though determined to win _somewhere._

She grinned, "Of course you do. You can put those in there as well."

"Whatever, this is fine."

Rianna chuckled and took a swig of pumpkin juice. "So, how're your classes so far?"

"It hasn't even been a week yet, Rianna!"

"I know, I asked how they were _so far_. Dumdum," she admonished.

"Oh…they're alright, I suppose. I'm getting better at Potions, and I'm getting the hang of Transfiguration, too."

"How's Charms coming along?" She knew that to be a weak spot of his.

He paused. "Herbology's looking pretty good, too."

"Reg, we're gonna give you Charms lessons whatever you have to say about it. If I can't do it with all my NEWTs coming up, I'll find someone that can." She couldn't let him fail Charms, that wouldn't look very good. Besides, it really wasn't difficult at all. Course, he'd never really gotten the hang of levitation in his first year, and the concept was kinda important for everything else…

"Nobody else will do it." The poor boy sounded miserable. "Everybody here hates me. They think I'm a pushover and I am!"

Rianna stared thoughtfully at him for a second or two, then smacked him upside the head. Mostly because she knew exactly what he was feeling like and partly because it was somewhat correct. They did seem to think that way of him, but that just went to show how he'd have to prove them wrong. "Of course there'll be people that want to tutor you!"

"No there won't. You're just saying that just because." The boy was determined to have a pity party.

"We'll see about that," she said, looking across the Great Hall at a pair of black eyes.

* * *

"I'm telling you, Remus, she's up to no good!" Sirius was saying to his friend. They were at breakfast in the Great Hall, having just enjoyed a hearty laugh at that Slytherin- Rianna Le Fey's expense. "She's trying to corrupt Regulus or something, I just know it! He's not Slytherin material, just look at him! He's like Wormtail here: completely hopeless!" Peter looked up from his pancakes at the mention of his name, but continued eating when he saw he wasn't being addressed. "She's trying to make him be just as filthy and nasty and scum-ridden as she and her cronies are!" This statement was followed by growls and curses and other manner of disapproval from Sirius at his brother's friend. 

Remus sighed, putting down his goblet of juice. "Sirius, really. She's genuinely friends with him! Have you seen how protective she is of him? He's like her little brother!" Sirius rounded on the werewolf, who continued pleasantly. "And just look over there, now, they're laughing." He grinned at whatever might be making them laugh. It was a nice carefree thing, laughing…

Sirius, however, glowered. "She's probably telling him lies about me and making me out to be some sort of joke, or- or- I dunno, some sort of…urghghg!" Sirius threw his head on his fist, propping it up and glaring at the pair across the Hall. He just knew that lil chit was up to something. All Slytherins were a bad lot, and she was no exception. His brother was, though, of course.

"Sirus, Sirus, give it up! He's your brother, but…come _on!_" It was James now, cutting in. Sirius started all of a sudden, then grabbed both Remus' and James' robesleeves, jerking them inward, one on each side.

"Looklook! Did you just see that? She was just talking to Reg and then she stared at me! She really _is_ talking about me to him! She's got a plan, she's trying to get him to hate me or something, or- or duel me, or try to hex me or jinx me! I just know it! Look at the way they're talking! He's looking miserable, see? He doesn't want to do whatever she's bullying him into," he said confidently. His eyes were narrowed and he was somewhat hunched in his seat, pointing a small finger at the pair as though the other two couldn't see where they were. The others rolled their eyes and let their friend carry on with his paranoid suspicions.

Lupin and Potter rose, heading off to their Common Room, but Sirius waited a moment or two until his eyes had followed a pair of Slytherin backs all the way out of the Great Hall. The girl had been pointing to a piece of paper. He was sure it could be the layout of the castle. She probably wanted to ambush him. Regulus was looking unsure and biting his lip. Oooh, the thought of that little pushy, bossy, manipulative, silver-tongued brat was enough to make his blood boil. If she tried to use Regulus, he'd take her out- girl or no.

"You lot think it's funny, but just you wait till she makes her first move, then we'll see who's laughing. I won't have my brother used against me!" Sirius was on a ranting role and was not to be stopped.

"I thought you weren't very close to him," Remus said mildly.

"That doesn't mean I can let him fall to scum like her, Moony!"

The Marauders save for Padfoot all sighed. They'd just have to wait until nothing happened and Sirius felt like an idiot for this thing to be over, now.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: -smiles- Well, I hope you all liked that and are willing to review it and let me know exactly what you thought! I know it's been a while since I updated, but, yea, been busy. Cheers and toodles! I tried to keep them mostly in character, hope I succeeded! 


	3. Planning Ahead

AUTHOR'S NOTE: LONG TIME NO UPDATE, NO! Lol, sry bout that! But I get inspired when I read over something I've written, I get the urge to let everyone know what happens next, so…here's the next chapter! -smiles- Enjoy!

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 3: Planning Ahead**

Sirius came out of the Transfiguration class rubbing the back of his head and only slightly annoyed that his friends were laughing at him. "McGonagall really doesn't let up, does she?" he asked. He sounded genuinely surprised at her strictness.

"It's taken you seven years to realize this?" Potter grinned.

"Well, you know, it might go better for you," Lupin chimed. "If you, oh, I dunno, actually _did_ something in class? Maybe? Possibly?" The truth in his statement made the feigned uncertainty all the more hilarious. "You could at least _pretend_ to take the notes, it honestly won't kill you," he continued while trying to shove his own two feet of notes into his bag.

Sirius yawned and stretched, shrugging carelessly. "Why bother? I already know what's going on better than all those dopes that take notes." Lupin rolled his eyes.

"Well, I hope you like the structure of the corner of the classroom, the spiffy architecture, etc, etc. because at the rate you're going, you'll be spending many more class hours facing it." Lupin was in prime lecturing form.

"Ooh, lookit the big bad prefect lecture me!" Sirius intoned, waving his fingers around. "You're twice as bad as the Head Boy over here. Between the two of you, it'll be up to me and Wormtail to keep up a reputation, and that's just like saying it's up to me."

Potter shoved him for his Head Boy comment while Lupin retorted, "That's because the Head Boy doesn't give a hoot!" Pettigrew grinned uncertainly, not sure whether he'd been insulted or teased good-naturedly.

"Anyhow, I've a match in a week or two, against Hufflepuff. Should be no worries, eh?" Potter raised his hand to ruffle his hair as a red headed girl passed, then hastily stopped. She took no notice of him, however, and he seemed slightly more subdued as he turned to the rest of his friends. "Their Seeker's Fletcher Todding, and you know how _he_ is. The rest of the team's pretty good, though, so I guess I should drill ours during practice. It's no use if your Seeker isn't any good, though, so I'm thinking we got this one in the bag." James was ever confident about his flying skills.

"Yeah, yeah, sure Prongs, whatever you say," Sirius drawled. His short attention span was already frayed, and his eyes were roving the semi-empty halls, trying to find something entertaining to occupy him with. In a sudden flash of irritation, he whipped the scroll Lupin's eyes were avidly following to and fro out of his hands, holding it out of reach.

"Hey! Sirius, I was reading that!" He made for it fruitlessly.

"I know, stop it," Sirius admonished. "You read too much, it's unhealthy." He tapped Lupin's temple. "Your head will explode, mark my words. Put too much information in there, and you won't know what to do with it." He laughed suddenly and added, "Yea, then you'll end up like one of those Mungo's people." He made an empty-headed noise and flailed about as though he had no control over his arms or legs, eyes rolling in their sockets.

Lupin grabbed the roll of parchment tersely and unrolled it, stiffening in disapproval while the other three laughed. "We have a test next hour, if you'll recall," he said stonily.

"Oh, hey, c'mon now, Moony, I was only joking!"

"You'll note, I think," the brown-haired youth said lightly, "that there is a section for those with lycanthropy in the Hospital." That shut them up.

"Prongs, you don't by any chance have those notes, do you?" Sirius asked abruptly.

"Yea, of course, here," Potter offered quickly. The atmosphere was one of embarrassment and slight awkwardness. Sirius had taken the joke just that much too far. While a jest like that would have gotten on the wrong side of polite, gentlemanly Lupin no matter what, he was always, always very conscious of his condition.

As they took their seats in Charms, Lupin muttered quietly, "It's fine, guys, don't worry about it." By which simple statement, they had been forgiven.

* * *

Rianna sat with her quill in her mouth, trying to remember the various charms they'd learned and what each individual one did. Flitwick had hinted that the test would be grueling and that without studying, one was liable to fail it. By the time the students had all arrived and settled themselves, Flitwick stood on his customary pile of books, face barely peeking over the sheaf of tests he held in his arms. A flick of his wand, however, sent a parchment to each student's desk and he bid them all start immediately, as the test "might take most the until the end of class". 

"Most", however, were done within twenty minutes. Rianna was among the slower test takers, however, as she liked to read and reread to make certain sure she hadn't made a mistake. As she got up to turn in her paper, however, a leg stuck out and she stumbled forward a couple steps, barely catching herself in time on Lupin's desk.

"Sorry," she gasped quietly to Lupin, who looked worried at any potential injury. Walking on to the Professor's desk, Rianna threw a cold, "Excuse me," over her shoulder at her tripper.

* * *

Sirius was furious. Not only had his leg been an honest to God accident, since it had happened, he figured she may as well _act_ as if she had been tripped! What was with the "Excuse Me"! Did she think she was too good to actually fall or what? Her superior attitude got under his skin. Any normal person would have turned around and let him have it, especially after everything he made sure to dish out to her every chance he got. This high and mighty, holier-than-thou demeanor was _not_ going to do. 

He turned to his cohorts. "Psst! Guys, she is soo planning something! But I'm going to make a plan, to stop her plan, so it's going to be Plan A1, or something."

"Padfoot…that's ridiculous," Potter said.

"No, it's not, watch. When I catch her at it, you'll be singing a different tune!" There was no stopping Black as soon as he'd gotten a notion in his mind.

* * *

Meanwhile, whilst having holes bored unbeknownst into her being by a certain raven-eyed Gryffindor, Rianna calmly screwed the cap back on the bottle of ink she'd been using and turned in her seat to the girl sitting hind her. "Thanks, Violet," she whispered, placing the bottle on the other girl's desktop. 

"No problem."

Turning back around in her seat, the firewitch felt the moments tick past her as test conditions pervaded the classroom. She pulled out a piece of parchment and commenced to draw curlicues on it for the remainder of the class. Curlicues that were increasingly invisible as there was less and less ink on the quill tip. By the time the bells had gonged for the end of the school day, Rianna was thoroughly dumbified. She felt as though the last hour and half and succeeded in draining her brains through her ears. She'd never been so utterly bored in her entire life.

Having made it out of the classroom untripped, she headed to her dormitory. There was a spot of homework to be done, and also, some much desired sleep to be obtained. Rounding a corner, she came upon Regulus's smiling face. "How was the test?" he asked as he fell into step beside her.

"Bleh," she answered, a dead look crossing her face, eyelids adroop. "It was THIS much easier than Flitwick lead us to believe." She indicated with her wide armspan, just how much the difference was. He chuckled and she sighed. "_Anyways_, how's Charms coming along?" Regulus fidgeted with his sleeve and Rianna rolled her eyes in exasperation. "You still haven't moved to the front of the room, have you? And seen Madame Pomfrey about your eyesight? Typical. Well, we'll get that done this weekend, but as for those test scores…I'm not liking them one bit." She pulled out a folded piece of parchment and commenced to quiz the poor kid mercilessly as they walked.

Even the stairs offered no relief, as Rianna didn't let up the quizzing. She had an uncanny knack of walking and reading at the same time, and this included stairs. "The swish and flick wrist movement is most closely associated with which charm?" They were nearing the end of the staircase now. Regulus's voice suddenly carried a quality of deep concentration, and his body was angled more towards her than straight. Picking up these small hints in her behavior, Rianna snapped her head up, glancing first at him, than around at her surroundings.

It figured her eyes would meet with a certain someone's. She sighed inwardly, hardening herself for yet another confrontation, but outwardly, her demeanor didn't change. "C'mon, I'm sure you know this one, think back to last year…you know…swish and flick…what comes to mind?" She folded up the paper, feeling this much was enough, as he both thought about the answer and tried to avoid Sirius at the same time. She'd only just started to tuck the parchment into her pocket, when-

"_Acio Parchment_!" -…it was ripped out of her hands by the Summoning Charm. "'_Wingardium Leviosa'_?" Black read allowed, perplexed. Regulus's face brightened, as he finally "remembered" the right spell, and he opened his mouth to repeat it, but the firewitch cut him off.

"Forget it. He won't be there to help you cheat on a test," she said smartly. It came out sounding harsher than she'd intended, but Black's presence really pushed all the wrong buttons.

Sirius stared at the piece of parchment in his hands, brows furrowed, while Rianna stood with her arms folded across her chest, coolly annoyed with her friend's elder brother. He scanned the rest of the slanted handwriting, mouthing various charms, all learned within the first and second years. "What is this?" he demanded to know.

"A list of charms," she answered shortly. "You see, that's why it's got those big letters spelling 'Charms' at the top, and underlined. It's called a heading and will usually tell a reader what the following text is about."

"They're all first and second year charms," Black pointed out, ignoring the condescending comment. "How're you supposed to hex or jinx me with these?" Lupin hid his face in his hands in embarrassment at the comment, as though sure up till now that Sirius wasn't _quite_ serious about his convictions from earlier.

"Yes," she answered slowly, as though if she said it too fast, he might get confused and she'd have to explain all over. "Because Regulus is a second year student. As for hexing and jinxing you, why in all the seven hells, would I put so much time and energy into thinking about you? The only times I ever think about you are when I'm forced to interact with you, and those times, as you can see-" she snapped the parchment out of his hands and shoved it into her pocket. "Are most distasteful to me." Whirling on her heels, she turned down the hall, walking at a brisk pace while Regulus tried valiantly to keep up without running.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Review, pretty please? -huge smile- 


	4. Charms Tutor

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I realize it's been another one of those times where updates are few and far between, but please bear with me. –grins- I like to only update when I feel it's worth it. –smile- So, here's to another chapter! -toasts-

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 4: Charms Tutor **

Rianna's hair was already a nice shade of red by the time the pair made it to their dormitory. The few Slytherins lounging about in the Great Hall glanced up at their arrival, then continued doing whatever it was they had been previously engaged in. The young firewitch's hair catching on fire wasn't a big deal, it happened from time to time. Wicked temper and all. She sat with a huff on one of the high backed chairs in front of the fire and glared into it.

"Ri- Rianna?" Regulus tried tentatively.

"What?" she demanded.

"Umm…he didn't mean anything by it, really," the younger boy offered hesitantly. Then, continuing in a rush as she turned to set her glare on _him_, he added, "I mean, he does stuff like that all the time. Not to you, I mean-" He was stumbling over his words, but Rianna was the one person he knew he could talk to, so even if she didn't like what he had to say, he was going to say it. "Lucius does stupid things like that to you all the time, remember? He's always grabbing stuff outta your hands or- or, just glaring at you for no reason, you know how he is. Sirius doesn't mean anything by it, he does it to everyone as well."

It was strange for Rianna to hear Regulus defend someone against her, but they were, after all, brothers, and whatever their relations in Hogwarts, he _had_ spent eleven years of his early life with the infuriating individual. She was just cooling down when Regulus mumbled, more to himself than to her, "And anyhow, aren't girls supposed to like it when boys flirt with them?"

The firewitch almost choked on nothing. She smacked Reg's head where he sat on the floor by her chair and gave him a "wtf!" look. It wasn't only her hair that was heating up this time.

"What?" Regulus inquired at the sharp rap to his head. It hadn't hurt, but he felt it was entirely uncalled for.

"First of all, Luce and Black do not, I repeat, _do not,_ like me. Second of all, no, they most definitely are NOT flirting with me. Third of all, get thoughts like those out of your head! If you're thinking that, there's no telling what else you might be thinking." She winked at him, and when she saw his face turn a bright red, she knew she once more wielded the upper hand in the conversation.

"I- I- I wasn't thinking anything, honest!" the raven-haired boy protested, but that did nothing to remove the knowing, self-satisfied smirk on her face. "A-Anyway," Regulus continued hastily, "you haven't finished quizzing me. Skip _Wingardium Leviosa_ for now." Rianna obliged, her anger having passed, in any case. They continued practicing for another hour before she remembered she had other homework to be getting to.

"Aright, then, I've gotta be getting to my other stuff now, Reg. You look over this list, if you have any extra time, yea?" She yawned and stretched. "By the way," she added, frowning slightly, "you're doing a lot better than I had expected. It shouldn't be too hard to get you back on track." She smiled down at him fleetingly before ruffling his hair mildly and making her way down the steps to the girls' dormitories.

Rianna grabbed her bag and rummaged through it quickly to make sure she had everything she needed. Potions would be a cinch, so she could save that for last, Charms wouldn't be so bad. Transfiguration, though, would need some work, and so would DADA. The young woman grabbed all her stuff together, threw it haphazardly in her bag, and then made to walk out of the dormitory.

"Easy there, Firechild!" called Violet in her accented twang as she lay lazily in her four poster. Even though Violet was in the same year as Rianna, she addressed everyone as "child", "boy", "girl", "honey", or something equally as coddling. "Didn' you say you're outta quills and ink, honey? How you 'spect to git your work done if you haven't got any of 'em on you?" She winked and nodded to her bedside table. "You can borrow mine, but girl, you's gotta git your head outta the clouds sometime." She laughed and waved Rianna's embarrassed protests away.

"I'll pay you back, I promise," she said before dashing out the door, now completely armed to tackle the evils of homework. Crossing the common room, she noted with satisfaction that Regulus was working on his homework, and also appeared to be helped by a girl with black hair who had her back turned to Rianna. The firewitch made a mental note to store this information away for later teasings.

* * *

Outside, the somewhat dulled afternoon sun coupled with raucous, but playful breezes made Rianna want to drop her homework and just laze around. But she couldn't-! She absolutely _had_ to get the homework done, and since Transfiguration was the hardest for her at the moment, she had to tackle that one first. Sighing in resignation, she pulled out her Transfiguration book and her wand, and commenced to flipping pages until she reached the page in question. Being in her seventh year, the hardest spells were being taught. They were now working on transfiguring large objects. 

Rianna cast her asymmetrically colored gaze around the grounds for something large she could transfigure. Not people, they couldn't do people yet… Muttering slightly to herself, she remembered Hagrid, the Hogwarts gamekeeper and remembered his enormous pumpkins. They were definitely big enough to qualify for "large objects". Making her way over to Hagrid's hut, she walked along until she reached the back. There she found none other than Hagrid himself.

"Hiya, Hagrid," she greeted. She didn't hate the man as most of her housemates did, but at the same time, she did find him a tad…how should she put it….stupid? Still, he was good-natured, and that was points in her book, any day.

"Hallo, there," he answered, smiling and waving over to her from his pumpkin patch. He had all his tools in one gigantic hand, so she could only assume he was about to leave. "What devilry are you up to this time?" he asked, winking.

She grinned, "Nothing other than the sin of homework, really."

"Ah!" he nodded.

"I was wondering if I could borrow a pumpkin." She held her arms behind her back and rocked slowly on the balls of her feet. She knew this made her look (as it would anyone) a little bit more innocent than just standing there. Not that she was up to anything at all, but still, a little extra for her cause couldn't hurt.

"Whatcha need a pumpkin fer?" Hagrid asked, eyes narrowed a fraction in suspicion.

"Transfiguration homework," she replied promptly. He shrugged and motioned to his pumpkin patch.

"On'y, don't ruin the biggest ones, am saving those fer Halloween." He grinned and went inside his hut. She waved and gave him the thumbs up for reassurance that his biggest pumpkins would go untouched. Now she had a large object, but what to turn it into? They were getting on in their years at Hogwarts and lessons were becoming looser. They had more freedom of choice and everything wasn't handed to them on a silver platter anymore. Which was, of course, both nice and stressful at the same time.

"Hrmm…." She mused. Glancing at the edge of the Forbidden Forest which was just feet from her, she decided on a tree. She'd transfigure the pumpkin into a tree and then back again. So she wasn't very creative, so what? That's not what she'd be getting the points for.

Several tries later, and she still couldn't get passed turning it into a bush. It simply did not seem to want to grow upwards. This wouldn't work, she'd already written down on the parchment that she was aiming for a tree, and since this particular bit of parchment was spelled, she wouldn't be able to change it to "bush" and leave it at that. Her hair was starting to change in her frustration. This was supposed to work. She had the incantation right. The sweeping motion of the spell right, and the pronunciation was right, as well! Why did the spell refuse to work for her? A slight cough behind her made her turn.

"If I may?" said Lupin from the doorway of the back entrance to Hagrid's castle. Rianna was immediately on her guard. She knew who _he_ hung out with, and even though he was a prefect, that didn't mean he wouldn't be above abusing his powers. Potter abused his Head Boy status all the time. She narrowed her eyes, but didn't move as he stepped nearer to her, although her grip on her own wand tightened when he reached for his.

"You've got the spell right," he said, as though reading the frustrations from her mind. "But the motion is a tad off. For this sort of transfiguration, there's always a slight variety to everything." At her perplexed look, he clarified. "For instance, you're using the standard sweeping motion. But you want to turn this pumpkin into a tree, correct?" She nodded mutely, coloring slightly at her failed transfiguration attempts. "Then," he continued, "after you perform the standard sweeping motion, you need to trail the spell _upwards_, like this." He swept his wand in the familiar arc, but then, instead of leaving the spell to form, swept his arm in a quick fleck upwards, as though directing the spell on how to take form. "Now you try."

She fidgeted with her wand nervously and cleared her throat, then copied his movement. Glancing at him, she saw him nodding in encouragement, "Yes, that's it now…" After which, she repeated the motion, adding the incantation, as well.

It was a small tree, given that, but a tree it was nonetheless. She grinned in relief and turned to Lupin in gratitude. "Y'know, I was certain sure this particular bit of homework was going to take me half the day! Thanks for your help, I'll keep it in mind for next time, as well." He smiled and gave her a sort of salute, then turned to leave, going back into Hagrid's hut. As the door opened, she heard Hagrid call out to the both of them for a bite and a quick drink before it turned dark.

"Coming!" she called as Lupin chivalrously held the door open. She gathered up her belongings and made her way to the door, from which she could hear several other voices. Good, there was company. That was always nice. The dim interior seemed even darker after the sunlight of outside, but after a few moments and several blinks, Rianna was becoming accustomed to the lighting.

"Done that bit o' work there, redhead?" Hagrid asked, smiling and offering her a cool glass of pumpkin juice. She accepted it and grinned.

"Yes, actually, sooner than I'd expected to. Well, okay, so I had help, but still." She winked at Lupin who grinned likewise. "And just so you know, my hair is completely, I repeat, _completely_ black at the moment, thank you very much." She tossed her locks over her shoulder with a flick of her head.

"Well, I gotta say, _that_ is definitely a first," said a voice that was full to bursting with laughter. Her ears twitched and she turned to regard the figures lying on the couch, although she knew before setting eyes on them who they'd be. Why didn't she know? If Lupin came out to the pumpkin patch and there were voices inside, _of course_ it would have to be them! It seemed a day didn't go by without her having run into them so far, and she was NOT liking the pattern her days were taking. That is, a nosedive as soon as she'd run into _him._

This would make three times in one day. Was it some sort of record? First, in the morning before breakfast, then in the hallway after Charms, and now here, in Hagrid's hut. Were they living solely to torment her every waking moment? She pursed her lips and knew she was falling into the shields and guards she always used when dealing with Black and his cronies.

"Yes, well, it was nice meeting you, as well," she said shortly. Turning on her heels, she apologized to Hagrid on leaving so abruptly, set her untouched glass of pumpkin juice down on his table, and made her way to the door, resolutely ignoring Black's uncouth question to his companions. ("I call the juice in the glass! But can one of you guys wash it first? She touched it.") She paused to throw a quick smile to Lupin before exiting the hut and making her way up to the castle.

She'd reached the Great Hall before realizing that her next class, Care of Magical Creatures, would take her right back outside. Sighing, she slumped and turned back. Care of Magical Creatures, too, was doubled up with Gryffindors. Something that, at the moment, she very much wished was not true. There was nothing but a long, infuriating test. The first day back meant teachers wanted to know what students remembered and what they'd forgotten, and what better way to do so than testing them outta their minds?

* * *

Rianna yawned and stretched, lazily looking over her answers before handing her sheet in. She was among the last few to finish, so didn't have long to wait around before the others were done as well. Lying stomach down in the grass with her head propped up on her fists, Rianna sighed and steeled herself for the worst, which was yet to come. She hated Black, without a doubt, but Regulus's need was greater than her grudge. So as soon as Professor Kettleburn dismissed the class, she dusted herself off, and strode resolutely over to the group.

They were walking off in the direction of the castle, chatting amongst themselves when she planted herself square in the middle of Black's path. He looked up and smirked down at her. He was bout a half head taller than she was, but she refused to let that daunt her. "You," she said, pointing a finger at his chest. He lifted an eyebrow in mock surprise. "Your brother is failing miserably at Charms." She shook a piece of parchment with Regulus's grades on it in front of him. "I'd help him, but what with NEWTs coming and everything, I won't be able to. You're good at Charms, aren't you? Help him." She shoved the parchment roughly into his chest. "He's _your_ brother, after all."

His smirk widened and Rianna stiffened inwardly. This had _not_ been the impression she'd been trying to make. "What?" she asked stiffly.

"Nothing," he replied smoothly. "It's just…what are you always talking to him about, heads bent low and everything? If you're hoping that under this ruse, I might be caught unawares, then-" He was cut off by Potter and James who both started talking over him immediately.

"He's just being really thick, Fey," Potter supplied, cuffing Black on the arm.

"We think he had one too many butterbeers," Lupin added, patting Black's chest and looking meaningfully at her.

Rianna quirked an eyebrow. Something strange was going on here. "What's…going on here, exactly?" she asked slowly, suspiciously. Black elbowed his way out of his friends and told her, quite flatly.

"You're plotting to use my brother against me, aren't you? You and all the rest of your foul little Slytherin friends." Rianna's eyes widened at the absurdity of his statement, an act which he mistook to mean she felt she'd been found out. "I expect you're jealou-" he made to finish, but Rianna could take no more of this cocky mannerism. Potter was chortling behind Black, Pettigrew was laughing and Lupin, while grinning, was hiding his face in his hands, disbelieving his friend and feeling sorry for Rianna at the same time. He lifted his had and made a circular motion next to it to indicate Black was a tad loopy.

She snatched the parchment of Regulus's Charms grades she'd brandished at Black earlier and stuffed it into a pocket of her robes. She was glaring furiously at Black. She knew he was a dog, but didn't think he'd think up such a ridiculous excuse to get out of helping his own brother. "Forget it," she said icily, while her hair changed speedily from black to deepest red, tips smoking. "I thought maybe you'd grow up since the last time I saw you, but apparently, coming to you was a mistake. Thanks but, I'll handle this myself," she continued in sharp tones. Potter's grin was starting to fade and Pettigrew was looking uncertainly at his friends to see whether the situation was still comical or not.

Turning on her heels, Rianna stormed away, the fire of hair falling about her shoulders proof that things had not gone well at all. No one bothered to comment as she stormed inside, all a fury. Reg's eyes widened, though, seeing as how her hair was on fire again, and it didn't take him long to guess why. Sighing, she slumped into a chair and said quietly, "Reg, I'll be your Charms tutor, okay? I'm not very good, but I hope you don't mind." She grinned up at him as the fire of her hair dulled down and finally returned to just hair of the deepest red.

Regulus nodded, but he wasn't stupid. "He wouldn't do it, would he?" he asked. Rianna wasn't going to lie to the boy.

"I expect he's too busy causing trouble to really care. Either that or he thinks I'm making it up. He doesn't trust me, " she added with a rueful smile. The poor second year stared at his hands and Rianna enveloped him in a hug. "Ah, don't worry, Reg. How's about we get you down to the kitchens for a bite to eat? I'm starved and dinner isn't until another hour." Smiling slightly, the pair went down to the kitchens.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: So, yes, here's an update, and I'm thinking it's going to get interesting soon! -smiles- 


	5. Cloaked Spies

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Wah!! Another chapter, w00t!!!! Who would've guessed?! Enjoy!!! -grins-

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 5: Cloaked Spies**

Rianna had to stand on tiptoes, and still, it was very difficult to scratch. In fact, she might have had to resort to hoisting the growing Regulus onto her shoulders and having him scratch the inconveniently placed fruit if it hadn't been for Remus showing up just as she was grasping Reg under the armpit. He chuckled and strode over. Rianna stood there for a spell, glancing over his shoulder, eyes slightly narrowed. "Uh, are you here by yourself?" she asked Lupin, entering the kitchens. Regulus had already gotten to work on finding sweets he liked and chomping on them delightedly.

Lupin chose to ignore the question, and shrugging, Rianna let it drop. She couldn't see his friends anywhere around, anyways, so it didn't matter.

* * *

James and Sirius were just starting to get comfortable on a bench in the far corner of the kitchens when they heard voices and the sound of the fruit painting swinging open. Someone was coming. Quick as a flash, the cloak was thrown over the pair again and the two waited in silence. Technically speaking, students weren't supposed to be out at around this time, at least not in the kitchens. Remus and James could get away with breaking minor rules like that because if they lied, people tended to believe them. Well, they _were_ prefect and Head Boy, afterall, and the jobs didn't come without their perks.

The bespectacled Potter was about to remove the cloak in relief as he saw only two students enter, but Sirius kept it firmly covering them. "Shh, keep still," he ordered.

James frowned. "Why? It's just some students."

"It's _her_ and Reg."

James rolled his eyes. "For crying out loud, Sir-"

"Just shut up, mate. This is the perfect chance to see how right I am, after all. Or if you want, you can get out of the cloak, but if you do, we'll never know for sure."

James sighed a sigh filled with all the agony he had to put up with. Nevertheless, he tucked the cloak under himself eagerly and waited to see what would develop. Remus's eyes flicked towards where they were on the bench, but he made no comment.

* * *

Rianna found an empty bench and threw her bag onto it, then sighed deeply and let her body follow. "Oi, Reg! Grab me a bite as well, then get your butt over here. I shall be merciless!" Regulus attempted to say something with his mouth full and failed. The firewitch stretched leisurely. It had been such a long day! For some reason, it felt like an entire week had passed since she'd woken up this morning. She thought about all the day had held. _'It better get better than this,'_ she thought grimly. And her meetings with the elder Black had best be kept to the bare minimum: seeing each other in classes.

Somewhere behind her, Remus was getting together what appeared to be a feast. Several pies were carefully stacked one on top of the other, still steaming and smelling delicious. Rianna grinned and turned to him. "Either you've got an ungodly appetite, or someone's cookin' up a party somewhere." He grinned at her. She wished all Gryffindors didn't violently hate each other, because this one was really _very_ cute. She blushed slightly at her unspoken sentiments.

"What?" the brown haired boy wanted to know.

"Hrm?"

"You just colored visibly."

"Oh." She laughed. "Yeeaa...I do that sometimes." _'Ah, what the heck?' _she thought suddenly. "It's just," she continued, grinning from ear to ear, "I just noticed that you looked quite dashing in, ah, that uniform." It was the same uniform that everyone else wore.

Lupin paused and it was his turn to blush a furious shade of red. "I-it's the same uniform everyone else wears," he mumbled, staring determinedly at the task at hand, which was tying the savory pies up.

Rianna laughed, "All the same..." Lupin stood with his back to the far end of the room, where for some reason, the house elves were being unusually loud. She frowned in the general direction, but didn't comment as the minor commotion died down fairly quickly, then went back to gazing unashamedly at Lupin. He was trying very hard to seem perfectly normal, and _not_ like someone who'd just been called "dashing" by a girl.

"Really," Rianna continued, thinking out loud. "I don't understand how you're still single." Lupin coughed uncomfortably and continued to color up. "No, really," the firewitch pressed, bringing her hand down on the table and sitting up straighter. These were warning signs to anyone who knew them. She was in prime debating form. "I mean, you're nice," she counted off, ticking each virtue on her fingers, "smart, helpful, a prefect, _disciplined_- not like those dastardly friends of yours, if you'll excuse me- polite, not obviously disgusted by my being a Slytherin, and of course, handsome."

She paused, thinking over all that she'd listed. "Wow, you're like, perfect," she concluded, caught a bit off guard. "Will you marry me?!"

"I-" Lupin couldn't get much more than that strangled cry out before he sat down heavily at the table, overcome with embarrassment. He really was as red as a tomato. It was quite amazing, really. Rianna laughed and patted his hand, then called to Regulus. "Don't think I've forgotten you, Mister, just because I'm proposing to the man of my dreams!" Turning to Lupin, she added, "Have fun at that party, by the way." He nodded mutely, but didn't move.

"Mkay, Reg, do you still have that list?" she asked him as he approached her with food and a look of resignation.

* * *

She'd called him "dashing". And "cute", he reminded himself, she'd called him that, too. Not to mention "handsome", yea, that too, and also, what was it? Ah, yes, "the man of her dreams". Wow. It was hard to be as wholly embarrassed as Remus was at that moment, but also, at the same time, quite pleased with himself. Of course there was that one matter that would likely keep him single forever, but he really didn't want to think about his "condition" at the moment.

Then a new problem occurred to him. How was he supposed to get all this food back to the Common Room without the cloak? Furthermore, how was he supposed to get _them_ out, while being under the cloak himself _and_ get the food safely to headquarters? He glanced at Rianna where she was quizzing Regulus. How much would she notice, and even more, how much would she tell the professors about as soon as she realized Black was, in fact, in the room?

This required some deliberation.

* * *

Black and Potter had their fists shoved in their mouths. There was simply nothing else at hand that could even _begin_ to ward off their insane laughter. Remus. She was hitting on Remus- and very, very boldly, at that. Poor guy, he would _not_ look in their direction and the back of his neck was an overly healthy shade of red. Brilliant. Sirius wanted to bound out of the confines of the cloak and shake her hand just for bringing them this spectacular moment: Remus Lupin: embarrassed beyond all human speech capabilities! Black vowed to ingrain this moment in his memory forever after.

James, at his side, was in much the same state and harboring similarly hilarious thoughts before Black interrupted him in a whisper.

"Okay, okay, we'll take the mickey outta him- brutally, mind you- but afterwards. Right now, she's going to start coaching Regulus in the ways of Githood, just watch."

* * *

"Mkay, now, good, that's good. Now we're moving into stuff that was covered in the second semester of First Year- you ready?" She glanced over the top of her notes at him. He seemed nervous, but ready to take whatever she'd throw at him. It was fair, he'd done quite a good job. Remus sat across the table and at the far end from them, munching on a slice of pie and seemingly in deep thought. The last vestiges of color were starting to leave his face, and she decided she'd have to renew it before leaving tonight.

"Let's see..." she scanned her list of spells. "Ah! What is the spell used to fix minor cracks, scrapes and small, broken objects?"

"Umm..." he thought hard, left knee jiggling up and down as he tapped the tabletop, willing the answer to present itself. "Uh..._Fixo_?" he guessed.

"Are you guessing at me or telling me?"

"Umm..."

"Hint: You use the spell to _repair_ things..."

"_Reparo!"_ He grinned at her, wondering if he'd gotten it right. He was sure he had, it sounded familiar now that he'd said it.

She grinned, "Awesome! See, you _do_ know this stuff, you just don't know that you know."

He was excited. Getting answers right boosted his confidence- which was his only real problem. "Next one, next one!"

"What's the spell for opening ordinarily locked doors?"

He thought about this one for a bit. "It's a longer one, right?"

"Yup."

"Gimme a second."

* * *

James sighed. It was stuffy and hot underneath the cloak. "Mate, they're studying, just like she told you. It's bloody hot under here, and I'm starving. Before you know it, Remus'll have finished all the pies and if that happens, so help me, I'll murder you! Food is important to me, y'know..."

Sirius really didn't want to admit that he was wrong. I mean, he _really_ didn't. "She's telling him how to open locks- isn't that suspicious?"

"Paddy," James said, in a deceptively calm tone, "She also taught him how to fix things. And that was for unmagicked locks, dolt, didn't you hear? I'm getting out." Without giving Black a second to stop him, he slipped out from under the cloak.

* * *

"_Alohomora?_"

"Are you _sure_?"

There was a pause. "Yes."

"Forsure for sure?"

A longer pause followed. "Y...yea."

"Is that your final answer?!"

Regulus was almost afraid now. "Yes!" he almost cried.

"Dingdingdingdingding! You win the prize!"

"You better not have finished all of the pies, Moony," came a male voice from behind them. Rianna yelped involuntarily and jumped up, turning swiftly to see who it was. She had been sure the only ones in the room were Remus, Regulus, herself and the house elves. People popping up out of nowhere made her jumpy.

"What are _you_ doing here?" she inquired, immediately suspicious.

"Never you mind," Potter answered, brushing her off completely. But Rianna remained persistent.

"And how exactly did you get in here?"

"I was just born here two seconds ago," he answered shortly, grabbing up a slice of pie and biting into it ravenously. She really wanted to hit him, very badly.

Addressing Lupin, she made an irritated "tsch" sound and asked exasperatedly, "How exactly can you be friends with..._that_? I fail to understand."

Lupin shrugged helplessly, and instead, offered Rianna a piece of pie by way of temporary peace treaty. She was just about to reach for it when James snatched it nimbly and took a large bite. Through the food in his mouth he managed to admonish, "Don' giff anyfing to hur, giff it to we, Iff been starffing!"

Lupin look exasperated. "James- really. There's plenty to go around."

* * *

This was getting really boring, Sirius decided, if everyone was just going to stand around eating pie without him.

* * *

"No, cuz I still need some, too," a new voice chimed in. Rianna had the new slice of pie Remus had just given to her about halfway from his extended hand to herself when it, too, was plucked out of her hands and shoved into a mouth she very much detested. She knew she should have left when Potter showed up, she really did know it... Turning abruptly to Regulus, she hoped feebly that they'd leave her alone to tutor.

"Ahem, yes, that's correct. _Alohomora._ Uh, where was I? Umm...aright, did the lock, the fixer, the levitation..."

"Okay, waywe you weren't" Sirius swallowed his mouthful and continued, "trying to pit Regulus against me, but you're still slime, you know that?"

Rianna shut her lips tightly and prayed for strength, patience, and that her hand would not grab her wand like it very much wanted to and jinx the crap out of Black. "God, I know we learned a lot of spells in first year, but for some reason, I can't remember many of them..." She scrutinized her list. Ignoring will usually make even the meanest of pigs lose interest. "Do you remember any you're having trouble with at the moment?"

Regulus didn't say anything at all. She glanced at him then muttered a silent oath under her breath. "Just because there's more stupid in the room now doesn't mean you can clam up," she intoned severely. "Stupid people are a fact of life. They exist. They permeate all societies. You will, eventually, need to learn how to function around them." Remus laughed outright, making Rianna smile, but she never took her eyes off her charge, who seemed too nervous to laugh, but amused enough to smile. Even Potter chortled appreciatively.

Sirius, however, let his chair fall down hard from where he had it balanced on it's two hind legs. Striding over to Rianna, he poked her shoulder, hard, forcing her to turn at least momentarily to face him. "Are you implying something?" he demanded, eyes narrowed.

"First of all," Rianna started in a dangerously low voice, "never, ever- _ever_ touch me. Second of all, if you wanna start something, say so to my face. Third of all, yea, I am." Her eyes flashed, and her hair smoked, giving her the look and feel of a gargantuan thunderstorm about to break loose mercilessly.

Black let out a string of curses. "You little-" but before he'd fully plunged his hand inside his pocket, Rianna had whipped out her wand and in less than a half second, both had their wands out, pointed at each other, fury radiating off them in waves.

Potter and Lupin stared, wide-eyed. The situation had definitely gotten out of hand. "Hey-hey! Lupin hurried over, trying bravely to get between their two wandpoints. No wands!" Neither relented, however. "Sirius, mate, think a little bit, you're being extremely thick. Put your wand down."

"No!" he snarled. "She just really gets under my skin and I'm going to fix that once and for all."

"Excuse me?" Rianna spat. Being nice had it's limits as did ignoring all the slights. "_I_ get under _your_ skin?! _I'm_ not the one who goes out of her way to cause trouble and tick off others. I'm through dealing with you and your incompetent, your-"

"You are such a-"

Rianna didn't hear how he ended that extremely rude sentence because at that moment, Regulus tugged on her sleeve. "Stop it, please, if you stop he'll stop, I know he will." he begged.

"Like hell I will!" she retorted.

"See, you _want_ to start something, don't you?!" Black yelled.

"You prat!" Potter exclaimed, punching Sirius hard in the back and tackling him from behind. "Remus, grab his wand," he instructed and the latter was only too quick to obey. Before long, the two had the snarling and fighting Black pinned to the floor, unarmed and glaring up at Rianna with hatred in his eyes. She, in turn, lowered her wand, seething, and turned away, concentrating on putting out her hair somehow.

Calm, deep breaths. Calm, deep breaths... The house elves were all in a fright. Their squeaky voices added to the din. She couldn't think clearly with so much noise. But they seemed calmer now. She could hear footsteps approaching, at least- wait, what? "Shit!" she cried. The others heard them too, now. "Quick, hide!" she grabbed a fistful of the younger boy's robefront and attempted to toss him under the table, but already, she could hear someone scratch the pear.

James and Potter leaped over tables lithely until they reached the back, and something shimmered for a second, then suddenly, they were gone. The portrait hole opened and in walked Professors Flitwick and Zeldine, followed by an overeager Filtch.

"What seems to be the matter?" inquired Flitwick, looking quite flustered.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Professor," Rianna said, stalling for time.

"What, pray tell, are you three doing out of your common rooms and in the kitchens at this time?" inquired Professor Zeldine, the Divination professor. She was a somewhat gifted Seer, but most of her predictions and "soothsaying" abilities came from her knack of picking up situations and assessing people. "And you, a prefect!" she added, noting the badge on Lupin's chest.

"We're terribly sorry, Professors," Rianna repeated. "Regulus here, felt a bit faint, so I was taking him down to the kitchens, see, and I ran into Lupin here, who was just returning from the library. He got worried and helped carried Regulus down here, as I wouldn't be able to if he fainted, you understand."

Flitwick smiled at Lupin, but Zeldine only raised an eyebrow at them and questioned, "But why bring him here instead of to the nurse?"

"Wha? Oh, umm, well, he was getting one of those headaches he gets sometimes, they usually happen when he's hungry and we missed dinner today, so I knew that must be it-"

"Missed dinner? What were you doing missing dinner? Don't you nasty kids love eating and throwing food around so's I gotta pick up after you? Don'tcha love that, kids?" It wasn't the first time that the young firewitch got the impression the caretaker was more than a little insane. To her story's credit, however, Regulus really did look a little green, thanks to the night's excitement and also as though he might cry.

"Well, I was helping Regulus study for Charms, we didn't notice the time passing," Rianna supplied truthfully. She brandished the paper off which they were even now studying as proof. Flitwick smiled, quite pleased with the pair.

"Why- very well done, Miss Fey!" he piped up in his squeaky little voice. "Ten points to you, for helping and showing such excellent character. And ten points for you, Mr. Black, for knowing your weak spots and trying to become better!" The two grinned. Not only had they avoided getting into trouble, but they had also been rewarded! "Ah, and ten points for you, too, Mr. Lupin, for following your prefect duties and helping those in need." The tiny professor clapped in obvious happiness at the greatness of the world and invited the others to turn in, advising the students, to follow suit soon.

"Yes, sir," they all chorused. Filtch eyed them, wanting so much to hang them by the ankles in his office but muttering reassurances to his cat, insisted that he wouldn't fail the next time. The portrait closed firmly behind them and the three left in the room let out a huge sigh of relief. Then Rianna grinned and lifted her hand for a high five from Regulus. "Hook, line, and sinker! 'kay, we'd really better get going now, or we'll really be in trouble."

She shoved the bit of parchment into her bag and shouldered it, stuffing a few rolls into it for later that night. Apologizing profusely to the house elves, she promised that nothing like that would ever happen again, and for them to please not send second-grade food up to her house tables in the morning. They assured her they wouldn't and almost pressed her out the door, eager to be rid of anyone wielding a wand and proving they may use it.

Out in the hall, at the end of the appropriate staircase, Rianna turned to Lupin. "Thanks for sticking to the story, Lupin," she said sincerely.

"Nonsense, it saved my hide, too," he reminded her. "I'm not so quick at thinking up the perfect lie." He grinned, gray eyes twinkling slightly in the candlelight.

She smiled. "Well, y'know..." She tapped his prefect badge, "That came in handy too." He laughed slightly, brushing it off.

Regulus cleared his throat. "Can we go now, or are you two going to stand around flirting all day?" he wanted to know, impatient to be out of possible trouble's way. The two blushed and looked away, murmuring farewells and goodnights. Two steps away, Rianna turned and said, "Oh, and by the way- tell Black that's quite the cloak he's got."

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Well, what do you all think? I know it's been ages since I updated, but that's really something that I couldn't help. -smiles- Hope you guys enjoyed it and thought it was at least halfway worth the wait! Don't worry, I promised a SiriusxRianna pairing, and it really will be that, just give it time.

Please review!!!


	6. Enter Lily

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I only got one review for the last chapter -tear- Ah, well...hope you like this one!! -grin-

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 6: Enter- Lily**

Before turning in, Rianna was sure to point out that if Regulus thought she and Remus had been flirting, it was _nothing _compared to what he and his black haired "girlfriend" were up to earlier. She promptly refused to hear the blushing boy explain that they were studying. What a day it had been! The firewitch climbed into bed feeling like she could just collapse. It was hard for her to imagine she was only sixteen, and not ninety-nine.

Yawning and feeling herself lulled into sleep, she made a quick mental note to return Severus's potions book back to him. She'd lost hers, (wonderful how these things happen) and borrowing Severus's had been no good- he'd written all over it. So much so, that it was impossible to make out the actual text. Checking one out of the library until she ordered a new one was probably her best bet, at this point. After that, however, she had little time to spare for thoughts, having drifted into blissful sleep...

* * *

Remus Lupin had no sooner sat on his bed and taken off his robes when he heard what he knew would be but the start of some very uncomfortable days. Sirius started, of course.

"Hey Moony, how're you doing, mate?" Remus chose not to reply, and continued preparing for bed.

"Yea, how're you feeling?" James wanted to know. Both spoke with barely concealed mirth. At Remus's persistent silence, they pressed on.

"How's your _girlfriend_ doing, Moony?" Sirius inquired, as though he really cared to hear an answer. They both burst out in laughter and Remus tried valiantly and maturely to carry on with his life despite their childishness- it did no good, of course. "How _is_ she, Moony? Fine and dandy? How are the kids? The kids okay? How many have you lot got, anyhow? She seemed quite keen to start on the task, if you ask _me_-"

"I didn't," Remus supplied, slightly irritated and more than a little tired. He just wanted to get some sleep, honestly. Did they have to dish this out to him at this time? And, great, all that pumpkin juice he washed the pies down with had to have its consequences now, of course. Irately shuffling out of his sheets, he made for the bathroom in the far corner of the room, reflecting that perhaps the others would be asleep by the time he came back.

No such luck. Sirius, in fact, followed him to the bathroom and a few seconds later, James did too. Now quite annoyed, Remus attempted to take care of business anyhow. Sirius nodded at his friend's, err, "utensil". "Did she get a load of _that_ yet?" James and Sirius guffawed stupidly.

"You know, it's hard for a man to pee when his two best friends are going to be standing there watching him so avidly. It's quite disconcerting, actually." He made his way to the sink, miffed.

"No it isn't," Sirius countered. "Here, you can watch me all you want," he invited, pulling his robes over his head and getting ready to take care of some business himself.

"No, _thank you_," the sane one replied shortly, making his way out of the bathroom, eyes rolling at the impossibility of those two.

As he was leaving, he heard James boasting, "Pfft, I could get mine further, no problem!"

"Oh yea?"

"Sure can!"

"I'd like to see you try-"

"Just watch, then."

"You know," Remus called over his shoulder, "It's a bit too much love when two men are in there with their pants down at the same time." There was a second of silence and then both James and Sirius came hurtling out of the bathroom, both looking a tad green and acting as though the other had a virulent form of cooties. Thankfully for the werewolf, this effectively put their plans to brutally take the mickey out of him on hold- at least for the night.

* * *

The next morning, Rianna awoke fresh and ready to take on the new day. Contributing to this refreshing feeling was the fact that she knew she would never have to take anything Sirius dished out at her any longer. She now had, in her possession, what she liked to call "leverage". That is, one peep from him, and the headmaster would definitely be finding out about that pretty cloak he had. This would be a very good year, she could tell.

Humming slightly out of tune, she made her way down to the breakfast table, once again, in her green velveteen pajama bottoms and a white t-shirt. It was only Sunday. How she relished the weekends! Propping open a new book she'd checked out recently against the jug of pumpkin juice, she commenced to read and eat at the same time, sometimes forgetting to eat while so engrossed in reading. She felt rather than saw Regulus come down and sit beside her.

There weren't many people in the Great Hall just yet. They liked to take their time, since there really wasn't anything pressing to get done- not even homework, since term had just started. Well, seventh years had it, but who really cared? The weather was too beautiful to worry about homework.

The girl reading found it a tad harder to concentrate when a quartet of laughing young men came down the stairs, cuffing each other lightly this way and that. Still, she forced herself to read normally, reminding herself that the book was far more interesting, anyways.

In reality, it wasn't all four of them that were laughing. More like Potter, Black and Pettigrew were, at the expense of Lupin, who merely smiled and rejected anything they said. Rianna flipped a page and carried on minding her own business.

* * *

"When's the hot date, Moony? Or are you skipping straight through to the honeymoon?" They guffawed some more and Remus resigned himself to just putting up with their idiocy until they eventually gave up. This was the plan, anyway.

"Where'll the wedding be? Some dark, cursed cave, no doubt." James nodded to emphasize his point.

"Nono, they'll want it in their ancient and most noble house, of course. Hey, Moony, you a pureblood?"

Despite his resolve not to say anything, he really couldn't help himself when he asked, perplexed, "Honestly, Sirius, what has that got to do with anything?"

James and Sirius blinked. "Well, she's a Slytherin, isn't she? Her family's bound to be pureblood, and proud of it." He made a face. "Gross." Then a new thought struck him. "Hey, wait, then you guys probably won't get married! Even though you're pureblood too, the in-laws probably won't like you associating with the likes of us, for one thing- and there's your condition..."

James sucked his teeth. "Tough luck, mate. She seemed really into you, too. Or maybe she wanted _you_ in _her_!" Remus blushed, mortified, and batted at his friend.

"Guys, seriously, that's just rude. Enough already!" He might as well have been talking to a wall for all the good that did.

"Excellent, Prongs!" Sirius commended, and the two high-fived each other. "But wait, no, there's still hope for our mate- they'll just have to elope."

"We can conduct the ceremony inside the Womping Willow!" James exclaimed, getting excited. The two dissolved in laughter and continued to make outrageous plans. If Remus didn't start associating with some sane people soon, he'd be in St. Mungo's in no time- and not due to his lycanthropy, either.

* * *

Rianna read the same sentence for the fourth time in a row and still didn't register it's meaning. It was hard to read and comprehend at the same time while certain persons were cackling like hyenas at the next table over. She grit her teeth. Honestly, a person couldn't even read in peace around here. Making an irritated "tsch" sound, she left her breakfast half finished and shut her book, tucking it under her arm. Throwing a quick dirty look at the offending table, she made her way to the library, where she was sure to find some Madame Pince-induced silence. Thank heaven for her.

* * *

Movement in the table across from theirs made the four marauders look up in interest. "Hey, your girlfriend's off to somewhere," Sirius noted mildly.

"She's not my girlfriend." The response had become almost automatic.

"Whatever."

"Anyhow, she has the right to go wherever she wants, you know."

"Don't defend her so easily, you're sounding like a whipped chap." James sounded disgusted at the prospect, even as his eyes followed a laughing redhead's as she entered the Great Hall and sat down. This did not pass the werewolf's notice. He laughed derisively.

"Oh yea, speaking of whipped..." He made a noise like a whip crack and called over, "Hey- Lily! Lily!" The results were instantaneous. James stiffened and a wild, scared look came into his eyes. He wasn't ready! What was he supposed to say?! He quickly messed up his hair in an effort to look cool, suave, as though he really didn't care what he looked like, and just let his natural, ruggedly handsome looks take over. Looks he didn't have, by the way. Then, just as quickly, he flattened his hair, remembering she had admonished him quite firmly against the ruffling of his hair.

Lily came over to where they were sitting, looking a little puzzled, but also on her guard. "Yes?"

"H-hey Evans." James's voice was a little hoarse and it nearly cracked with the effort of maintaining normality around this particular girl.

"Potter." She nodded in acknowledgment and turned to Remus, who had called her over in the first place.

"How was that Charms test, do you reckon?" he asked casually.

"Oh, it was a piece of cake, I thought. I mean, really, Flitwick exaggerates too much." She rolled her eyes and tossed her hair over her shoulder. James watched the track it took and the way it settled, mesmerized.

"How about Potions?" Remus wanted to drag this out. It wasn't everyday he was able to render James speechless and utterly at a loss to do anything but gape stupidly.

Lily shrugged. "It was okay. How about for you?"

He shrugged likewise. "Same. What about that one potion we had to do...the..."

"The _Mentis Novo_?" (A/N: Mentis is Latin for Thought, and Novo is change, according to freedict dot com, so this is a thought changing potion. To control, in a sense, how people think)

"That's the one."

"As easy as all the rest of them. Slughorn's not exactly the hard type, is he?"

"I actually had a bit of trouble with that bit about preparing the unicorn hair- what exactly are we supposed to do with it?"

"Oh, that's easy," she supplied immediately. "Why don't you come down to the dungeons before lunch and I'll show you?"

"That's not exactly an ideal place to be before lunch..." He made a face at the thought of all the pickled things in jars floating around.

Lily laughed. "I agree- but I really don't have time before then at all today!"

"It's fine, thanks for helping."

"Sure, no problem- today before lunch, don't forget!"

"I won't," he affirmed and she winked at him.

"It's a date then!"

James almost had a heart attack. As soon as Lily had bid them farewell and gone to her end of the table, he pounced on Remus, snarling and practically foaming at the mouth. "What a friend you are- how could you agree to a date with your best friend's girl?!" He had Remus by the shirtfront, pressed against the table. A voice cleared behind him and he looked up. It was Lily.

She raised an eyebrow reprovingly at James and said to Remus, "By the way, I forgot to tell you- bring your Potions book, please. I'd rather not carry mine around."

"Sure, will do," Remus answered from his place against the table, looking up at her.

"And how many times do I have to tell you to stop bullying others, Potter? You don't ever learn, do you? And I'm not your 'girl', so you can forget about that, as well." She threw a disgusted look at him and marched back to her end of the table. James instantly deflated and sat in a self-pitying gloom for the rest of the day, occasionally throwing dirty looks at Lupin.

"How can you be so at ease around her? She's gorgeous!"

"Yes, well, I, unlike you, don't think with my eyes, or, ahem, anything else but my brain, for that matter."

James cuffed Remus's arm. "Don't talk about her like that. And don't think for a minute that you're meeting her alone!"

"That was only fun for like, five minutes," Sirius complained. "I'm going to go find that Slytherin wench. At least she's more entertaining. Wanna come see your girlfriend Moony?" he invited. "Keep her on a leash, maybe?"

"Haha, very funny. I have homework."

The one called "Padfoot" shrugged, "Suit yourself." As he got up and left, he could still hear James moaning about why girls seemed to like Remus so much, even though he was about as cautious as a ninety year old hag.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I bet we could all come up with a few reasons why, huh? Well, what'd you think of it? I love reviews, and I though this was a pretty long chapter, perhaps? Please review! -smiles- 


	7. Deals With Dragons

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Could this POSSIBLY be an UPDATE?! o.o Late in coming, I know, and yes, I am working on my Demon Diary fics as well, please give it some time, I'm in a very very very hassled time in my life right now (read: college T.T).

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 7: Deals With Dragons**

Rianna found an empty table by a corner and sat facing the walls, her back to the rest of the empty room. This way, she'd definitely be able to concentrate. The book really was very interesting, after all, about the debate on using certain body altering potions on humans. It provided argumentative essays from both sides and she found herself thinking both views made valid points.

Apparently, there was an underground network of witches and wizards that dealt in potion brewing for muggles. They'd sell muggles cheap, temporary body altering potions that made the muggles look slim and toned no matter what they ate. Eventually, though, the effects wore off and the muggles returned to their previous states of being- some were worse. Most of the witches and wizards behind these schemes had been caught by the Ministry already, but this kind of thing still happened regularly.

Personally, she felt, hey- if they were stupid enough, they had it coming. Still, one could not expect muggles to be too intelligent, it never was a safe bet.

Alas, that simple pleasures such as quiet reading were not written in the heavens for her. There was some sort of ruckus near the restricted section. It wasn't long before the entire library knew what it was.

"MR. BLACK! WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! UNHAND THAT YOUNG MAN THIS INSTANT!" Madame Pince's screechy voice startled the few who had sought refuge in the library, making several of them jump. Alarmed, Rianna went to go see what that infuriating boy had done this time.

Sirius Black stood next to a first year Slytherin who had a Stink Pellet in his hand. Black's wand was pointed at the kid, hidden from most by the sleeves of his robe. It took the firewitch a few seconds to figure out what was happening.

Black, in his endless capacity for devilry, had been coercing the frightened little first year into throwing a Stink Pellet at the Restricted Section, knowing full well there was a Repelling Charm placed over the entire area. As soon as the boy had tossed it, it would have bounced back and exploded, choking the boy in noxious fumes. Rianna felt a growl form in her throat. He was just such a little-!

Since he was getting an earful from Madame Pince, however, she felt justice was being served. "You, Snape!" The librarian pointed to a tall, gangly seventh year Slytherin boy with greasy black hair, a pale face and a slightly hooked nose that became quite prominent when he scowled, which was often. He scowled now, as the library's head addressed him. "Take this boy down to his dormitory."

Snape slouched off and shoved the kid in front of him who looked, if possible, even more terrified. Seeing Madame Pince's eyes roving around the room, Rianna quickly turned to return to her table in the far corner behind the tall bookshelves, not wanting to be pegged by her scavenging gaze. But too late. The movement of her robes as she turned was like a rag tossed before a viper- Madame Pince pounced.

"You, Fey!" Rianna winced and froze, turning slowly.

"Yes, Madame Pince?"

The vulture pointed to Black. "Escort Black down to Mr. Filch's office. He was right to ban such atrocities as Black possesses." She gave him a severe look, as though she would very much like to wallop him with a book, and turned, heading back to her desk.

Rianna groaned.

Black was glaring at her, as though in challenge. Trying to seem as indifferent as possible, Rianna tossed her hair over her shoulder and marched out of the library without waiting for him to follow, which he did anyways. He seemed suspiciously cheerful for someone who'd just gotten into trouble, but she didn't comment. Commenting would only make him talk, and the sooner she could get this over with, the better.

"So, what were you in the library for?" Just her luck that he decided to talk to her anyways, right? He walked slowly so that she was forced to slow her pace as well.

"Reading," she replied shortly. Honestly, was that even a question? She had always thought he was a rather intelligent individual (if hopelessly stupid), but she was beginning to rethink that opinion.

"I see," he answered, not bothered by her terse responses. "You do that a lot, don't you?"

She assumed he didn't need an answer for that and continued walking. Halfway down to the dungeons where Filch's office was located, however, he stopped short, stretching leisurely.

"Right then, you carry on," he told her and promptly turned in the opposite direction. Rianna frowned and yanked him around by the back of his robes.

"What do you mean, Black, you were sent down to Filch's, and that's this way."

Jerking himself out of her grasp, he made a show of straightening his robes. "Yes, well, you really expect me to go willy nilly, just like that? Listen, Fey, maybe you do whatever you're told to do, but I don't. See ya 'round." With that, he commenced walking down the corridor in his direction of choice.

Miffed, Rianna chased after him. "Oi, Black, you get back here! I was told to escort you, and I am NOT about to pay for YOUR cheek!" She'd plunged her hand into her robes, fulling intending to jinx him if it came to that, but something wasn't right...

It took her all of maybe two seconds to register that her arms and legs were bound tightly by thick vines that came from nowhere. They'd also firmly laced themselves across her mouth so she could no longer speak and proceeded to try their best to suffocate her. In her anger, she'd failed to hear Black call the spell and had thus been unable to whip up a counter spell. Damn it. She'd have to remember to _never_ let her guard down around Black- he had no decency whatsoever.

Furiously, she glared at the coldly amused, raven-haired boy with a hatred born of private humiliation. The fact that she was rendered helpless because of this cheeky, rude, obnoxious, insane and _cocky_ boy was more than her ego could take. There was no way he was from the same family as Regulus. It just wasn't possible. She struggled somewhat helplessly in her bindings, both wishing and dreading that he might help her.

Far from helping, however, Sirius surveyed his handiwork with something akin to pride, grinned, and said, "Maybe that'll teach you to mind your own business. I'm a busy man with things to do and places to be." Rianna wanted to remind him she knew about his cloak but that was an impossibility- on account of being gagged and slowly strangled. Meanwhile, Black gave her a quick, contemptuous once-over and turned, walking down the hall.

It was just great that now, when she needed it most, she was beginning to fall behind in Charms. She hadn't yet mastered non-verbal spells. Glaring intently at her pocket, imagining she could see through her robes, she pictured her wand spurting out flames. She tried several times before a weak handful of flames erupted through the pocket of her robes, effectively setting her on fire and forcing some of the Devil's Snare to retreat.

"Ow, ow, ouch!" She let out a string of creative words. "_Aguamenti! AguamentiAguamentiAguamenti!_" She poked her wand at her robes repeatedly, until she was a sopping mess.

A small sniffle escaped her lips, surprising even herself. She sunk slowly into the small pool of water she'd created and let her sniffles increase.

Why? Why was it that somehow, Black was getting mixed up into her life? Why was it that at the center of every little disturbance with the world, stood Black and somehow, she was thrust into the eye of his hurricane? She vowed, then and there, that no matter what happened, even if the whole of Hogwarts were to spontaneously combust, she would not go see what was happening, but instead, run in the opposite direction. This, she felt, was a sure way to avoid this parasitic being for the rest of her natural life.

It just took so much energy- too much energy to put up with Black. To ignore him, to goad him, it was all the same. There was no easy way away from him and for some reason, he'd decided she was the bane of his existence and had thus far, successfully made her life a living hell.

Rianna was feeling quite sorry for herself at that moment, wet, hungry from her unfinished breakfast with the muscles in her neck sore from near-strangulation. The steel colored clouds outside didn't help, casting the hallway she was slumped in under a dark, depressing light.

Sniffling her last sniffle and wiping a few tears from her face, she made her squelchy way to the dungeon common room, up the girl's staircase, into the bathroom and took a mildly hot shower. She renewed her resolve, under the relaxing spray, to really and truly avoid Black.

Sighing, she put on a clean, unscorched pair of school robes and headed down to the common room, having another forty-five minutes to kill before her first class. As she had hoped, a crackling fire was roaring merrily in the grate. Seeing a second year already in her favorite armchair by the fire, she promptly ordered him off.

"But- I got here first!" he insisted in a rather high-pitched voice. Apparently, he thought being bossed around would end with first year. How sad that she'd have to disillusion him of this happy notion.

"Yea, and I got here second. Now scram."

"It doesn't have your name on it- you didn't buy it!" The little boy's face was red from the effort of standing up to a seventh year. This was ridiculous, and wasting her relaxing time. Rianna pulled out her wand.

"Oh really?" She twirled it through her fingers darkly, having no stomach for childishness and let it emit green and white sparks.

The boy kept his eyes on her wand, then a split second later, scoffed, "Well, it doesn't matter, I was about to leave, anyways." She noticed, however, that he kept her wand in sight, giving her a wide berth.

The firewitch took a seat, thinking mildly that things would be a lot easier for Regulus if he'd grow a backbone much like that second year's. Maybe she should introduce them or something. She sighed...the fire was so warm and felt great after her bath and hectic morning. She rubbed her smarting wrists where the Devil's Snare had squished them so soundly.

Although she really knew she shouldn't, Rianna couldn't help but let her eyelids close gently. _Just a short while, _she reasoned. _Thirty minutes, tops._

* * *

One hour and fifty minutes later

* * *

"Mr. Black, you are free to go now," Professor Flitwick announced to the almost empty classroom. "Mind you remember that you still have that detention with me for this Saturday. You simply cannot continue to-"

"I'm so sorry Professor!" Rianna hurtled into the room, scaring the tiny Professor off his pile of books. She looked as though she'd just jumped out of bed, her eyes slightly bloodshot and her words tumbling over one another in their rush to explain her absence.

The short, squeaky-voiced Professor picked himself up slowly and resettled on his makeshift stool, looking as though he wasn't entirely sure it would be the last time he'd have to do so.

"...it won't ever happen again, I'm sosososo incredibly sorry, I just, it's been so, I mean, I intended to come, I have a clean track record, I- the time just flew by me and-"

"Ms. Fey, dear-"

"...all my homework's done, honest, I have it right here, let me show you-"

"Fey-"

"...see, all twelve inches of parchment, right here, and you can run a timestamp charm on it, too, it'll tell you I finished it right on time, I-"

"FEY!" Professor Flitwick cleared his throat. Rianna's foot-long essay fell to her side from where she'd been brandishing it in her instructor's face. "That will be a detention for you," he managed to squeak out.

Rianna's mouth dropped open. "What? But I just explained to you about how it was a huge misunderstanding!"

"You knew you had to come to my class at this time right now?"

"Yes, but-"

"And you realize you missed the entire hour's lesson?"

"Well, yes, but you see-"

"So you are behind one whole lesson?"

"I...I guess so-"

"Then that would be an unexcused absence, Ms. Fey. I'm afraid that will be a detention. You see, I realize sleep is necessary but perhaps you should get to bed earlier. Maybe you shouldn't tutor young Black so late into the night. If it is becoming too much for you, then I suggest you find him a new tutor. But I simply cannot have you missing my classes, you understand." He peered into her eyes from under his bushy white eyebrows, hoping she understood that he meant to help her.

Rianna was silent and deflated. "Yes, sir."

"Now, run along or you'll be late for dinner. You too, Black." With that, Flitwick hopped down and scurried away to the Great Hall.

Rianna stood there for a few seconds. Sighing, she rubbed her eyes and the bridge of her nose. Glancing down, she noticed she still had her essay in her hand. She placed it on the professor's large, cherry oak desk and turned to leave, completely ignoring Black's presence.

"Hey, Fey- wait up."

She ignored the call and made her slow, thoughtful way down to the dinner. She couldn't afford to be at detention- she really needed to study for her Transfiguration exam. On top of that, she now had an entire lesson of Charms to somehow make up. Seventh year had started and the staff was letting them know it.

"FEY!" He whipped her around with such force she stumbled and nearly fell backwards.

"What?" she demanded, almost too harried to get angry. Avoiding Black wasn't going to be easy if he continued to actively seek her out. A small, private roll of her eyes made her do a small double take. Black wasn't being quite as self-assured as she was used to. In fact, if she didn't know better, she'd guess he looked almost worried about something. "What?" she repeated, unwittingly less harshly.

He licked his lips and glanced up and down the corridor quickly, making sure they were the only ones in it. "Listen. We're both going to be stuck in that detention tomorrow, and knowing Flitwick, he'll have nothing better to do than to make us do lines. Now, I could be wrong here-" he raised his eyebrow, inviting her to contradict his next statement. "-but we both have better things to do with our time."

Rianna quirked an eyebrow, "I'm listening."

"So how about if we cut a deal."

That caught her by surprise. "A deal?" Immediately her inner sensors were going off. This scenario could only logically take place if Black was going to come out the better for it.

"Yea, y'know," he said tersely. "When people agree on an alternative to something else?"

"I know what a deal is," she replied hotly. She tossed her hair over her shoulder and pretended to think about it. What was the catch? She glanced surreptitiously at him as he stood there, glancing around the walls of the wide hallway. What little light fell from the tall, narrow windows at either end of the endless corridors wasn't enough to fully illuminate his face. She had no idea what he might be thinking.

The shadows played over his features alternately as his head jerked from one angle to the other. His eyes were restless, never landing on any one spot for more than a few seconds, and his full lips were bitten often by his white teeth. An eyebrow furrowed as he turned impatiently to face her directly again.

"Well?" he demanded to know.

The firewitch snapped out of her accidental study of the geography of Black's face. She felt herself color slightly at losing her train of thought so easily. Clearing her throat, she asked, "What exactly did you have in mind?"

Looking relieved, a mischievous grin crossed his features for the first time in that particular Black Encounter, and the old Black returned in less time than it took to "argh!" "Don't worry about it- just play along." He started to turn and head back.

Dumbfounded, Rianna grabbed his arm as he turned. In a split second, she was pinned against the wall with his wand poking at the soft area under her jaw line. She froze.

"Oh," Black said offhandedly, coolly returning his wand to the pocket of his robes. "I thought for sure you'd try something. Especially after your humiliating episode from earlier. I see your robes are repaired." He smirked that evil little smirk she hated so much.

The younger girl worked her mouth for a second in her surprise. She hadn't realized he may've stuck around to watch the show.

"What do you want _now_," Black demanded, as though she'd been the one keeping them thus far. "Make it quick, I'm starving and wanna grab the food before they start dessert."

"I need to know what you're thinking of pulling or I'm not along for the ride. Period." She stared at him solidly while he glared in annoyance back.

"Just shut up, who cares? What's it matter as long as we're out of detention?" Then, under his breath he added, "Nosy little-"

"Black! You tell me or the deal's off." She was fighting to keep her temper under control, but he always made a big show of laughing his head off every time hers caught fire and she refused to give him the satisfaction. Suddenly, a loud, rumbling noise issued from quite nearby.

Rianna jumped slightly, letting out an embarrassing squeaking noise. "OhmyGod, what was that?!" She glanced at Sirius to see whether he heard it too, and found him rubbing his stomach nonchalantly.

"Yea, well, I'm hungry," he shot at her quizzical stare. "We'll finish this later, I gotta go."

* * *

Three minutes later, Rianna, finding the closest empty seat at the Slytherin table, promptly sat down, cleared some space, and put her head down. She mentally reviewed everything she had to do in her head. All her homework- giving extra time over for Transfiguration, make up the Charms class and find out what the homework was- oh, and cancel Regulus's tutoring session.

A light tap on her shoulder made her glance up from her misery to where a smiling though weary looking Remus stood. "Oh- hey," she started.

"Hi." His voice was somewhat rough and scratchy, as though he hadn't used it in a while. He looked quite the worse for wear, with bags under his eyes, a tired smile and the occasional cough.

"You don't sound too good," she commented, raising an eyebrow. "You should probably go see Madam Pomfrey if you're coming down with something. It's going around, this time of year."

For some reason, this made him chuckle. "Yea, about that..." he trailed off, smiling ruefully. "Will do, I'm sure. How're you holding up?"

"Uh, I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?"

"Well, you know...word has it you slept passed Flitwick's class today." Rianna immediately glared at the Gryffindor table, where a Certain Someone was wolfing down baked chicken and seasoned mashed potatoes like there was no tomorrow.

"Ugh," she intoned, watching him like a person might watch a starved animal being fed at the zoo. "I hope he chokes on that and throws it all up." She grimaced and turned back to Remus who was hiding a smile. "Yea...I kinda have a lot on my plate at the moment," she told him. "Just kinda...lots to keep track of at one time, y'know?"

Remus's gaze trailed off and landed on her wrist. "What's that?" he asked, his features morphing from amused to concerned.

"Oh- ah, nothing, really, I had a small accident, you know how these things happen," she said in what she hoped was an offhand manner, quickly covering her wrists with the sleeves of her robes. She was somewhat surprised that The Supreme Idiot of the Universe hadn't bragged about the incident to his friends, but hey- she wasn't complaining. The brown haired boy still looked worried, seeming as though he'd like to press the issue further but she changed the subject abruptly.

"Hey, look, I appreciate you coming here and asking after me- I really do. But I just got hit with detention, am behind in class, so y'know...I'm kinda looking forward to some food to get going with all that stuff." She smiled to lessen the brunt of the dismissal.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, how rude of me," he admitted, ever the gentleman. His speedy retreat the to relative safety of his own table was closely followed by glaring Slytherin eyes. As soon as he sat down, the eyes turned to glare reprovingly at Rianna. She stared them coldly down and defiantly shoved cold potatoes into her mouth.

* * *

The day moved on relatively uneventfully after that point. She went to class, managed to tackle her homework, and slumped off to bed.

In the moments before sleep came to her, the day's excitements unwound slowly in her head, as these things are wont to do. She couldn't help but feel Black was up to something, and not just his normal pranks. He looked a tad too serious for that. She wondered whether Remus was quite as alright as he assured her and that if she was in Gryffindor, whether it would be any easier for her to convince herself to ask him out.

But in the next moment, she had drifted off slowly to sleep, and forgot anything she may've thought afterwards.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Oh my goodness, it really IS an udpate. O.o I'm so sorry for making you few loyal readers wait so long. But hopefully I will be "in the groove" of writing, lol, and maybe it won't happen again? PLEASE REVIEW (even though I'm a meanie fic writer and probably don't deserve them!) T.T

Oh and I still do promise it's Rianna/Sirius pairing. But you know, sometimes you have to go backwards to go forwards. -wink-


	8. It's A Date

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I've just been reading over this story and the few-and-far-between comments and it's just making me feel all shibby inside so here's another update. Don't kill me for not updating my other fics, pretty please, because if I'm not inspired to write but do it anyways, the results are hideous. I promise. -blink-

Anyhow, enjoy the update and please please please review every chapter, I always love it when someone does that because each chapter was given individual work and attention for your enjoyment! -hopeful grin-

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
****Chapter 8: It's A Date**

In the days leading up to the Halloween feast, Rianna spent most of her time worrying about the whys and hows of asking Remus out. He didn't seem to have taken her over-the-top obvious hints quite as readily as she would have liked, so it was on her to get the wheel rolling _somewhere_. On the one hand, she figured it could be because he really didn't want to be paired with her, but then, if she let that scare her, Rianna knew she'd think a lot about whether she was right or wrong.

She needed to make a list. Pulling out a spare bit of parchment, the firewitch thought for a second, then commenced writing. At the end of some fifteen minutes this is what she had:

Reasons To:

1. Cute!  
2. Nice  
3. Good Humor  
4. Polite  
5. Smiles

Reasons To Not:

1. Friends With Black  
2. Crappy Friends  
3. Friends With Black  
4. Probably not interested  
5. FwB  
6. Potter Friend  
7. FwB

Studying the results of her effort, she decided that in all real fairness, the reasons to were greater than the reasons to not. Ruffling her bangs with a breath of frustration, she crumpled up the parchment and tucked it into a slim textbook lying on her bed. It was probably one of Regulus's.

Getting up, she stretched a bit and glanced around. Okay, so she didn't want to wait until Halloween night to ask him, that would be way last minute, but at the same time, she didn't want to ask too early in case it turned awkward and there was too much awkwardness between now and Halloween (after which, other gossip would make her rejection seem forgotten).

Rianna had a great deal more time to worry about little things like this now, since Professor Flitwick had mentioned to her during the detention she had with Black that Regulus was doing fine in Charms. He wasn't top of class, but he was doing as well as the other children and Rianna needn't overtax herself. So she was left to worry about other matters.

The detention itself had been a breeze, but only because of Black, she grudgingly admitted to herself mentally. He'd transfigured random objects in the room to look just like the two of them, charmed both pieces of parchment on which they had to do lines so that the lines were already written, and then quietly opened the door so the two could escape. Really, in retrospect, she thought, it was quite simple. He didn't deserve THAT much credit. Anyway, he had wasted no time in donning that special cloak and hurtling down to his common room, while Rianna had been left a sitting duck, scrambling for cover and sneaking from broom closet to empty classroom all the way down to the Slytherin dungeons.

The rest of the days between then and now had been fairly uneventful. Of course there were a number of undesirable Black Encounters, but nothing so offending that she deemed it worth commenting on.

Remus's health was as poor as ever, she had noticed. He regularly fell ill and took a few days to recover. Although in the first few years of school, he would be so ill he'd be in the infirmary, now it was more of a rest and relaxation type of recovery.

She hoped he wouldn't be indisposed during the week of Halloween. The teachers had banded together in light of all the new joke shop distractions and declared that if enough people did well on their pre-Halloween testing, there was a possibility of turning the evening into a gala event.

* * *

For his part, Sirius had actually been relatively quiet and demure. That wasn't to say he had become a perfect angel, for devilry was a thing imbued far too deeply within young Sirius Black to ever be completely vanquished. Still, his attacks on his fellow students and teachers had diminished somewhat and he seemed to be caught lost in thought from time to time.

"Cheer up, you morbid old bloke," Potter commanded cheerfully Wednesday morning. He met Lupin's eyes over their friends hunched figure, where he was staring deeply into the depths of the pumpkin juice, deciphering it's immeasurable mysteries.

Lupin put his book away and quirked an eyebrow while Potter thumped Black in rough good nature on the back.

"It's something I've been kinda thinking about for a few days now," Sirius began. He made as if to sound offhand, as though it were something merely nagging the back of his mind, although his friends could easily see through the ruse. "Well, ever since that detention, anyways," the elder Black corrected himself.

Potter waved his hands slowly to indicate that Sirius could continue any day before his 100th birthday. Said friend scratched the back of his head distractedly covering up his embarrassment at his next statement. He let out a breath and continued, "Umm, remember how Moony's girlfriend and I had that detention?"

The two listening Marauders blinked once rapidly and a short, terse nod of their heads to indicate understanding. The tension was mounting, such that Remus let the girlfriend comment slide, eager to hear where this might be going.

"Flitwick told her Reg was doing fine. Y'know in his Charms classes." Sirius glanced around the vast Great Hall, smiling briefly at familiar faces, determined not to let anyone think he was thinking anything too serious.

Both Marauders still had their heads cocked, ears perked, waiting for their friend to get to the main point. He glanced at them in their attentive poses on either side of him. "That's it." He blinked. "What?" he added, for his audience had returned to their meals and books looking let down.

"Whatever," Potter huffed. "For a while there, I thought you might've had something important to say." He rolled his eyes, focusing his attention instead on his breakfast and the girl sitting across the table and five seats down from him.

"I thought that _was_ important!" an indignant Sirius declared. "Thought you lot, at least, would've found it worth commenting on."

"It's great that your brother's doing well again, Sirius, but that's hardly news to look so depressed about," the one called Moony reasoned. "Looks like Rianna's tutoring paid off."

"That's just it!" Black blurted out. "Don't you see?" The blank stares told him that his comrades did not, in fact, see. Not at all. Sirius rolled his eyes, "It's like this," he explained. "He's doing better because she helped him, but he's _my_ brother. I should've tutored him. She'd asked me to, and I didn't take her seriously. Not that that matters or anything, but-" he swept a hand over the back of his hair in agitation, trying to find the right words.

"You feel as his brother, you should have been there for him when he needed you, regardless of your differences at home?" Remus supplied helpfully.

"Yes!" Then a new thought struck him. "Speaking of home," he moaned, dropping his head into his nest of arms. "Mum's going to have a field day." James patted Sirius's arm gingerly, still not satisfied with the explanation he'd received while Sirius continued to bemoan his fate incomprehensibly.

A short, tentative throat clearing behind the three made them turn around. Hogwart's resident firewitch smiled down at Remus, nodding as briefly as possible at his compadres. "Hey Rianna," Remus grinned. "What a pleasant surprise."

* * *

Rianna felt her fingertips tingling with anticipation and she wished she could keep them from twining and untwining in front of her- it showed her nervousness more than she would have liked. But Lupin's smile encouraged her, and he _did_ say it was a pleasant surprise to see her. Hopefully that wasn't just a stock phrase he used on everyone.

Putting her muddled thoughts aside, she needlessly straightened the front of her robes and cleared her throat once more. "Hi." _Oh great, _she thought. _Overcome him with your genius, why don't you?_ "Can- can I talk to you?" she motioned away from his table. "Alone? I mean- privately? Somewhere?" _Shut up, he gets it,_ she chided herself.

Remus glanced at his friends sternly, both of whom had opened their mouths, identical glints of mischief already in their eyes. He himself was somewhat worried as he agreed readily, "Well, sure, come on," and let her lead the way out of the Great Hall.

Rianna stopped in the Entrance Hall, and turned abruptly. _It's now or never,_ she told herself. _You have nothing to lose and a very cute boy to gain._ "Okay, I'm just going to come out and say it," she told him, doing away with all pretense.

The werewolf crossed his arms over his chest, all ears. "Shoot."

"Remus, I was hoping you'd consider escorting me to the Halloween Gala this Saturday." _Nice- short and sweet! _her mind congratulated her. "I mean, that is, if it turns out to be a gala thing, y'know," she added, seeing Remus's look of surprise and hoping to talk through the bulk of his rejection. He was blushing lightly and trying to suppress a grin, it was so endearing. However, at the same time, he also looked uncomfortable. "If it turns out to just be a feast, then I guess we could just wave at each other or something, heh," she laughed awkwardly, her voice sounding higher than usual. "Unless you have other plans?" she supplied, hoping he'd let her down easy if he had to. "Because then I suppose it can't be helped. But if you don't then I think the feast and or possibly gala would be awesome." She laughed again, uneasily, praying an anvil would fall on her head, effectively shutting her up. "I mean, of course I'd think it was awesome, it was my idea," she rolled her eyes at herself, twisting her hands some more and praying she could transfer out of the country after this debacle was done with.

Lupin coughed quietly, taking a small step back and looking at Rianna apologetically. "Look, Rianna, Rianna, I really am flattered-" he started, and Rianna fell immediately silent, heart pounding in her ears. "I really mean it, you don't know how flattered I am right now at this very moment, but-"

She laughed hollowly, already hearing in her mind everything she knew he'd say.

"-I really think at this time that I can't justify escorting you." He really did look apologetic, but any guy could pull that face. Rianna tried to stop her bottom lip from trembling or her nose from turning red. She _knew_ he would turn her down, and even though she kept telling herself this exact scene would take place, she still somehow wondered at the back of her mind: what if? She looked at her feet so she wouldn't have to see his pitying gaze.

"You really deserve better." Ah, the icing on her pitycake. There it was. "You're a great person and-"

_You deserve someone better than me. How cliche is that? It's just like you knew now pick up what little dignity you have left and get the heck outta here. The sooner you can transfer out, the better._ She knew he must be saying something like that, but didn't bother to listen to the words spilling out of his mouth. He was looking concerned again.

"Look, Remus," she cut in, putting up a hand and trying to smile nicely. "I get it, mkay? It's all good. Really. Whatever, it was just a Halloween feast, y'know, not like I was proposing to you or anything." It came out much harsher than she'd intended and left an awkward silence that fettered between the two standing there at the bottom of the staircase.

Remus let his hands fall helplessly at his sides. "Just, remember what I said," He finished. "If I was whole and healthy, I'd be delighted. It's just not fair to you as it stands."

Rianna frowned. "Wait, what?"

Now it was Remus's turn to frown. "What?"

"What do you mean, 'if you were whole and healthy'?"

"Uh, everything I told you just now. Weren't you listening?"

"Never mind that," she said impatiently, waving the question away. "I mean, what did you mean by that?"

"I've been ill a lot- I'm sure you've noticed this over the years. It's just a chronic condition, y'know. I- I don't like to talk about it much, but I'd rather you weren't stuck with someone like me." He glanced around, ill at ease any time it came to his condition.

"So that's the only reason you're saying no?"

"Umm...yea."

Rianna laughed in relief. "Oh Remus, you idiot!" she exclaimed.

He scratched his head, mildly offended. "Now really, how do you expect a person to take that?" he wondered.

"Sorry, it's just that- I don't care if you get sick every now and then! As long as you'll be fine on Saturday, that's all that matters." She was grinning at him and feeling much much better. He, on the other hand, wasn't so sure about it. He raised his eyebrows. "Oh come on, it'll be fun!"

"Well...I still stand by what I sai-"

"So Saturday at six, right?" she asked over his losing warning.

He shoved his hands in the pockets of his robes, a broad smile on his face and shrugged. "Sure, yea, sounds good," he answered, looking pleased.

"Great, it's a date then."

"Okay."

"Aright."

"C-cool."

"Yea. Cool." They grinned at each other stupidly for a second or two before Remus pointed to the Great Hall.

"I- I'm gonna go back in there and maybe finish eating or- or something."

"Yea. I mean, yea, me too, I should probably eat. I mean, I eat on a regular basis, but now would probably be a good time as well. Y'know, breakfast and all. Oh my God, I am rambling. Again. So sorry." But Remus only laughed and held the door open for her.

* * *

Black cuffed Potter on the arm and jerked his chin in the direction of the great double doors. "Hey, Prongs, he's back. Look at that, he's grinning like an oaf- wonder what happened to do _that_ to our studious little prefect."

"No time like the present to find out, eh?" Potter quipped.

* * *

Rianna returned to the Slytherin table with a spring in her step. Sitting down solidly next to Regulus, she ruffled his hair a bit more affectionately than was usual. Two seconds later, unable to stop herself, she squealed in delight and swinging her arm around his neck, planted a firm kiss in the middle of his cheek.

* * *

A fountain of orange juice erupted out of Sirius Black's mouth, disgusting most of the table and making everyone else convulse in a fit of laughter. But this didn't phase the elder Black even a hair. He was livid. He would not have this- no, no, not at all.

"Ewww, gross!" Peter Pettigrew complained loudly, who'd been sitting almost directly across from the offender. "Sirius! Look what you did!" Most of the Gryffindors had faces contorted into expressions similar to Pettigrew's: disgusted, appalled and pissed. In the next second, a mass exodus of Gryffindors stood and shuffled their way out of the Great Hall.

Sirius slammed his glass down on the table so hard it was in danger of cracking. Yanking both James and Remus's robefronts, he demanded of them, "Did you just see that?! She just-did she- Did you just _see _what that-"

"Black!" cried a passing and very affronted McGonagall. "Detention."

"WHAT?!" he exclaimed. "Again?!"

McGonagall, ever unsympathetic, swept on her way.

Sirius had never been at such a loss for words. Ever. First _that_ and now _this._ He sat down heavily in his seat, feeling dead inside.

"That _lady_," Remus corrected his shell shocked companion, "just finished asking yours truly to the Halloween gala-" Sirius's eyes widened in incredulous disbelief as he turned to face Moony, hoping his ears had deceived him. "-and I said yes." Remus finished.

"OH MY-" Black threw up his hands in hopeless disgust. "Oh my- ugh! For cryin-" He let out a string of very colorful words, which was his favorite way of dealing with not having the perfect words to describe his current feelings. Potter shook his head in shared disapproval.

Remus rolled his eyes and packed up his books. "You guys should get to know her- she's actually fun. You know, even when you're not abusing her thoroughly for no reason." He patted Sirius on the back. "Make sure you clean up and good luck with that detention."

"Yes, Honey, I'll be sure to," Sirius retorted as sarcastically as he could, but it seemed to have no effect on Remus's sickeningly good mood.

* * *

Rianna glanced over at the ruckus from the Gryffindor table just in time to catch the lovely orange display. She'd been hoping to catch a much prettier sight, namely a sneak peak at her new date, but ah well. "Pig," she noted complacently, and skipped off to spend some time getting her Saturday preparations in order.

* * *

Padfoot could not believe his bad luck. Someone surely must have cursed him. There was simply no way one person could cause such a cascade of crap for him. First, she asks out his best mate, probably intimidating him or crying to make him agree. What a loser. And Remus, of course, had no backbone to say no to a woman, whatever type of vixen she may be. Then, she goes and makes a move _on his little brother_, and _then_, to top it all off, because of her, Sirius was now in possession of yet another detention. There was no getting out of McGonagall's detentions, either, he'd actually have to _do_ this one.

Releasing a string of even more creative terms, the frustrated individual tried to vent some steam to little avail. In light of the direction things were taking here, he almost preferred his home life. But thinking about home finally managed to cheer him up a few degrees. After all, he didn't have it quite _that_ bad here. Yet.

All in all, the only good thing he had to say for the rest of the day was that at least they didn't have any classes with the Slytherins on Wednesdays. He basically slept through Divination and as a result, received extra homework. Trying to kill time during Muggle Studies, he got into an argument with his professor over telephones, television, and the useless nature of both.

"But Muggles need these things for entertainment and communication, Black."

"No they don't, they're just lazy. If they wanted entertainment, they could just chuck some Floo powder into the grate and be at their mate's house in a jiffy. And if they just wanted to talk, they could pop their head in there."

"As I just finished explaining to you, they don't have any knowledge of these things-"

"Well, sucks to be them, then, doesn't it?" The class gasped and covered giggles. The professor sighed in resignation.

"Detention, Bl-"

"NO!"

"-ack. And perhaps for homework, you can research the reasons why both the telephone and the television were invented and their usefulness in the daily lives of Muggles. Twenty inches. Due Monday. That's in addition to the detention." The older woman massaged her temples. "I'm getting too old for this."

"Then maybe you should quit." Dead silence. "...putting up with kids like me! That'll add years to you, it will." A dazzling smile only barely let that comment slide.

As they left Muggle Studies, James pulled Sirius to the side. "Listen, Padfoot, we all get that something's bothering you, but if you keep this up, your butt's going to be out on the grounds any day and you'll be washing dishes for your mum till you're seventy."

"I know, I know," Sirius insisted. "I'm just, frustrated. I'm extremely frustrated right now. A lot of things are going wrong right now but I get that I need to chill or something. I don't know, y'know? I'm just already counting down the days till the holidays."

"What, you _want_ to be home?" James asked, disbelieving?

"No, not home-home. I was hoping your mum wouldn't mind if I spent the holidays at your place?" he quirked an eyebrow.

The bespectacled one shrugged. "It shouldn't be a problem, here."

"Thanks." He patted James on the shoulder. About to walk away, he paused. "You know...I really hope you let your mum know I appreciate her doing this. It's not a lot of people willing to put up with me."

Prongs' forehead creased. "Yea, sure. You positive you're okay? Anything you wanna tell me?"

The hand on James's shoulder squeezed it in gratitude, and dropped to it's owner's side. "Nah. I'm good. At least I've got one good thing to look forward to. But don't you have practice?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Get going, I already told you I'm good."

With a last, worried look, James and Sirius split ways.

* * *

Later that day as he was turning in, hair still wet from his recent shower, Sirius decided that things might go better for him if he would do the world a favor and stop being Sirius Black. After all, he couldn't afford to get booted from Hogwarts, it was the only real home he had. He'd have to make his final year last, whatever the cost.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: AHHH, Pleasepleaseplease tell me what you think! What parts did you like? What parts didn't you like? I really do listen to that stuff! Like when people said it was weird that Rianna didn't have many other friends, I showed some interactions with other members of her House- I do listen! T.T Review, pl0x?


	9. On The Same Page

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Look, a third chapter in less than two weeks- am I on a roll or am I on a roll? I just hope these chapters are worth reading! (Hint: A review would be a great way to tell me -grin-)

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life  
Chapter 9: On The Same Page**

Sirius was wakened early on Saturday morning by some upsettingly cheerful humming. He hated Saturday mornings because he was invariably wakened before his preferred time of two in the afternoon. _Who,_ he wondered, unreasonably irked, _could be up at 7:30 on a Saturday in the seventh year BOYS dormitory- humming?_ It wasn't like this was Hufflepuff House or anything, either, where that kind of odd behavior was acceptable.

Turning over and groaning, the seventeen year old batted aside the hangings from his bed, hung his head out and declared loudly, "Shut the hell up- whoever you are. Saturdays are still sacred to some of us!" Then he promptly slumped on the spot, too lazy to reel himself back onto his pillow.

Glancing over at him, James The Ever-Informed noted, "Well, Paddy's up." He began pulling back the curtains from Sirius's four-poster properly, filling the space with sunlight. Giving up the fight at last, Sirius managed to grouchily and noisily pull himself up.

His white T-shirt was awry from its owner's untamed sleeping style and his hair had similar war stories which its tousled state could attest to. Still not properly conscious, Black propped himself up into a sitting position with one arm while the other rested on his tented knees. His eyes were squinting from the brightness of the sun and he blinked around the room, getting his bearings.

Remus was bustling around the room, pulling various things from various places and placing them in various new places. It was he who was the Offending Hummer. Sirius gave up figuring out what he was doing and turned instead to the other two. Peter was sitting on a stool watching Remus and asking questions from time to time and James was currently tying Sirius's hangings back properly.

Rolling his eyes, Black said, "Why thank you sweetie-pie, you're such a doll!"

James batted away the compliment as if to say, "Oh, you!" and said instead, "Bless him, he's still having his hot fantasies about me." Ruffling the back of his own head he continued, "Oh, let the poor boy dream...it's hard to realize a great piece of meat like me is, in fact, taken."

Peter giggled and the others all laughed. "Pssh, yea, in your dreams you're taken for sure, Prongs." Sirius guffawed. "That lovely carrot-topped lass has done some naughty, naughty things to you there, hasn't she?" he inquired, turning the joke immediately around.

James put his hands on his hips, looking immediately like both a housewife and Remus, which was a scary thought and even scarier thing to see. "Sirius- cut that out. She's a nice girl."

"And of course, that's the reason you like her, right? Because she's a nice girl? Nice like when she tells you repeatedly what a jerk you are...and when she turns you down...in front of everyone...and brutally demasculinates you..."

James sighed and sat down on his bed, which was next to his best friend's. "Why doesn't she like me, you think?" he wondered, hoping Sirius would have the answer to a question everyone had long since given up on. There were plenty of girls that did like James Potter- just none of them were named Lily Evans.

"Oh my- Merlin's pants, James!" Sirius grabbed his pillow. "Snap out of it, mate!" he commanded. "You are going to die a virgin!" He chucked the fluffy object violently at James.

James picked up the pillow from where it fell after landing solidly on his face and wielded it over his head, towering over the lounging Sirius, "You take that back!"

"It's true!"

"ARGH!" There commenced a few minutes of chaos in which the young men gathered, as well as inanimate objects present were engaged in a scuffle of feathers, pillows and other squishy things attained from Peter's trunk. Eventually the hubbub died down, the excess energy in the room was spent, and Sirius, James and Peter collapsed on their beds, their exhaustion aided by their laughter.

"Thanks a lot guys." The three glanced around to a very annoyed looking Remus. He wielded a worn pair of slate gray dress robes that looked perfectly normal to everyone except him, apparently. Seeing the others' blank stares, he brandished the robes, emphasizing his annoyance. The other three glanced at each other and shrugged, returning renewed blank stares at Remus.

The mature one sighed in frustration. "You guys- I just finished ironing these and look what you've gone and done." At the silence, he supplied, "They're wrinkled! Now I have to do them over again."

"Uh," James started, "Why can't you just...you know- put them on?"

"Uh," Remus mimicked, putting his voice a few octaves higher, "Well because, they're kind of wrinkled?"

"Uh," Sirius followed, "Does it like, seriously matter?"

"Uh," Remus blinked profusely and added hand gestures to follow, completing the evolving Valley Girl stereotype. "Like, ya, it does?"

"Uh," Peter tried, "It doesn't?" There was a silence that lasted all of a few seconds then three separate pillows buried the joke killer.

"Whatever, Remus," Sirius continued by way of apology as he yawned and stretched. Rubbing a hand over his face, he noted absently, "Gah, I should probably shave."

Peter unearthed himself from his fluffy white mound excitedly, "You can shave?!"

"..." Sirus quirked an eyebrow at him. "Yea?"

"Really? Can I touch it?" he asked, already approaching his friend with a finger outstretched.

"Ugh, the hell's your problem, babyface?" the older one retorted, leaning away from his friends appendage and scowling.

James laughed, "Moony's been shaving forever," he quipped, watching Peter's delighted face turn to regard his other friend in new manly honor. He switched from trying to touch Sirius's face to Remus's. It was just too easy to bait him- why was he with them again? Oh, right, the Willow's knot.

Sirius muttered an oath and rolled his eyes, heading to the bathroom while Peter pleaded with Remus to touch his stubble. "Sorry, Peter, I already shaved this morning."

"Tough luck," James grieved, swinging an arm around Peter's shoulder. "If you stick your head in a toilet, it waters your cheeks and helps you grow a beard faster," he advised the sandy haired lad.

Peter looked up at James, eyes wide, "Really? Why can't I just put my face in the sink and run water over it?"

"_Because_," James explained wisely. "Toilet water is stagnant."

"Oh..." Peter's mouth was in an enlightened "O" shape. He didn't know what "stagnant" meant, but he didn't want to sound like an idiot by asking. After all, he felt like with all this talk of manly things like shaving, he was finally feeling like one of the big kids he hung out with. He didn't want to seem like a novice among them- he'd already made that mess with the joke earlier.

"And you know what can be used as a fertilizer to make it _really_ grow?" James continued, on a roll.

"What?"

"If you pee in the toilet, first."

Peter gasped. "Really?!"

"Really."

"But why does that make it better?"

"Well, you see young Peter," James lied with the ease of a seasoned pro. "There are lots of minerals that our bodies don't need on the inside that we flush out when we pee. However, it's those same minerals that can come in very handy for a lot of functions on the outside- like facial hair growing. So when we pee it out then use it for our faces, it's all natural and way better than any potion would be." A firm nod of the head further solidified Peter's belief in James's boundless wisdom, unbeknown that it was born of bullshit.

"So if I just put pee on my face instead, won't that be better than mixing it with water?"

"Undiluted pee...why Peter, you are a genius!" Patting his shoulder, Potter continued, "You should try it."

"_James_..." Remus warned. He was smiling, but really, Pettigrew was much too blunt a boy to give bullshit advice to- there was always the danger that he might actually follow it.

Prongs rolled his eyes and shoved Peter aside playfully. "Fine, fine, I made that all up Wormy, don't listen unless you want a rash on your face."

Peter laughed uncertainly, feeling the smooth, unbroken skin of his cheeks. He wondered vaguely whether James would've let him try it if it hadn't been for Remus, then dismissed the thought. These were his _friends_. Friends didn't let friends lather pee on their faces. "I think I'll just wait for it to grow by itself," he decided.

"Good call," Remus agreed, slapping him lightly on the back as he passed.

"So Moony," Sirius asked, coming out of the bathroom. "The dress robes- what gives?"

"It's Saturday," Remus reminded him, grinning.

Black blinked. "Yes. Yes it is. It is Saturday today."

Lupin turned to the mirror and adjusted his collar uselessly, thinking he'd answered his friend's question. He turned this way and that, not sure what he was looking for, hoping too many of his imperfections wouldn't be noticed.

"Do I have to kill you to get the answer?"

"What?" He glanced in the mirror at the impatiently waiting Sirius. "Oh, well, it's Halloween."

"..."

He rolled his eyes in exasperation. "The dance?"

"For crying out loud, Moony! You're getting all dressed up and spazzing like an old hen because of your date with that-"

"Lady," Remus overrode Sirius's more creative interpretation of the word.

"-and here I thought someone had died or something. You are quickly becoming a disgrace to the name of Marauder. Anyhow, why do you wanna go with _her_? I still can't believe you said yes. You can just hang around with us, like every year."

"I don't know what you're talking about, mate," Remus said, frowning slightly at his errant collar. "Some of _us_ have two detentions to finish tonight and won't have any time to attend the dance." The shocked expression that greeted him in the mirror confirmed that his friend had forgotten about that part. "And, it'd be nice to go with a woman for a change." Remus, ignoring Sirius's mock faint in the background and fidgeting uncomfortably with the random grooming objects on the dresser, half mumbled, "while I still can and all."

It seemed Sirius froze in mid faint and the atmosphere in the dorm became immediately several degrees denser. Remus continued smiling a small smile determinedly but it didn't for a second fool anyone. Proof being, as soon as James came out from the bathroom, he stopped dead in the doorway. His eyes sought out Sirius's and aimed a question. The other, in turn, briefly glanced at Remus and back. There was no further communication necessary.

"_Remus-"_ Potter began in a you're-being-utterly-ridiculous tone, but Remus held up his hands, shaking his head slowly.

"Forget it, Prongs. If he wants to be selfish, he can go right ahead and be." Sirius cut in, unusually brusque.

Moony glanced sharply at Padfoot's reflection. "How's that being selfish?" he demanded.

"Well, simple really," the ticked off Black reasoned in a deceptively straightforward manner. "You know you're never going to get married or have children or even a girlfriend for that matter," he said bluntly.

"Sirius!" James admonished sharply. "What the hell kinda thing is THAT to say-"

But Remus again held up a hand, unfortunately finding this statement perfectly logical and not the least bit insulting. "Yes...?"

"But you're still going to that dance with Fey."

"Un-huh..."

"Well, isn't that the most selfish thing you've ever heard?" Clearly no one followed his train of thought so he helpfully expounded. "Remus agrees to a date with some girl, knowing it won't be a long-term thing, knowing he's not going to let it be. So he's just putting up the girl's hopes for no reason, then break it with her at the end of the evening just so that he could have had a date in his life."

Remus's slowly wounding expression showed he hadn't thought of this.

"Why'd you have to go and say that shit?" James cried angrily, glaring at Sirius. "Now the idiot's going to cancel and it might've been a really good chance for him to-"

The two men in conflict ignored him. Sirius staring coolly and coldly into the mirror at his friend and Remus glaring, hurt, wouldn't lift his eyes from the dresser top. "Fine. You bring up a good point," he conceded. "You're right."

Sirius shrugged, the tension between the two broken. "Whatever. Of course, if it was me that had the lycanthropy, I'd spend as many dances as I could with girls. You know, as long as it's not a date-date, it's actually probably a lot easier to go through them like hotcakes." He grinned and strode to the door. "I gotta go see about those damn detentions. Later."

Remus blew air upwards, ruffling his bangs and shrugged. "Good thing he thought of it first, before I did something stupid."

"Oh come off it, Moony, that idiot's just pissed because he's got a load of detentions. You're not going to actually listen to him, are you?"

"Actually, I am." Pulling his cuffs, Remus looked at James. "Don't worry," he laughed. "I'll just explain everything to her and if she still wants to go, that's fine and if not, oh well." He shrugged. "Can't be too bad, right?"

"Uh, suuure..."

* * *

"Finished!" Rianna declared triumphantly, snapping her Transfiguration book shut and chucking it haphazardly into her bag. She stretched where she sat on the floor, smiling and carefree. Regulus glanced up from where he was trying to both do homework and play a game of wizard's chess with some fellow second year. The waif-like classmate was winning, but that might've been due to the fact that Regulus wasn't focusing entirely on the game. Rianna had the suspicion that his essay was suffering from similar lack of focus.

"Checkmate." The pale, nervous looking friend collected the pieces of the game and Regulus handed him a pumpkin pasty. Apparently they'd had a bet going.

"Y'know, I could use some sugar right about now," the girl hinted not-quite-subtly.

"Yea..." Regulus sighed. "We all want things we can't have." He grinned at her glare. "Like me, for example," he continued. "I just want this essay to be done with but it's not, is it?" After a half second's pause, he added overly meaningfully- "-yet."

"Dream on."

The boy let out another heavy sigh, more for histrionics than anything else and shrugged. "Ah, well. My problem is, at least, easily fixed. I feel bad for those people that have to wait endless hours for the Halloween feast to begin before they can get their sugar fix." Rianna was not going to give in. She continued to glare at him while he reached into his pocket, drew out a chocolate frog and unwrapped it slowly, meticulously, then bit off the head, savoring the deliciousness obnoxiously.

"You know I can just jinx you to tomorrow and steal your candy, right?" To which, Reg gave his "Quoi? Moi?" expression. "Okay, fine, what do you want?"

"Dish eshay hash to beh fidished."

"No way! I just finished my own essay, I'm not doing yours for a chocolate frog."

Swallowing, the younger boy negotiated instead for one body paragraph, a conclusion, and to have the whole thing proofread.

"No can do. I'll proofread it, and that's it."

"Umm...okay, how about just a conclusion and proofreading? C'mon, conclusion is just a summary and you can do that after you're done proofing it."

Rianna thought. "How many sweets you got on you? Not just chocolate, mind you!" The younger Black emptied his pockets and Rianna deliberated for a few seconds, then swept a good portion of the brightly wrapped treats closer to her, nodding. "K, fine, let me know when you're at the conclusion."

"I'm there."

The firewitch frowned. "That's impossible, you just tried to get me to write a body paragraph for you."

"I know. See, this way you feel like you won when really, I only needed a conclusion to begin with." Regulus grinned, loving any opportunity to one-up her. "Clever, huh?" he asked, tapping his temple.

"Clever my left-" Rianna started, grumbling. "You're just lucky today has been a good day so far!"

As Rianna snacked and proofed Regulus's essay, he asked, "So when's the dance?"

"After dinner, supposed to be."

"Cool."

"What're you wearing?"

"Uh, I don't know." She paused and looked up from her work, legs waving lazily in the air as she lay stomach-down. She tapped her quill on her chin, mentally riffling through her wardrobe. "Wow, I really don't know...what SHOULD I wear?"

"Well...how about that lavender set of dress robes you wore to cousin Andromeda's wedding?"

"Hmm...you think? Hey, how do you know about those, you weren't there- your mum doesn't think much of Andromeda. Right?"

"Yea, well, she wouldn't let _me_ go, but Sirius went anyway. Lucky dog." Regulus pulled a distasteful face.

"Really? He was there? That's funny, are you sure? Cuz I had a great time- well, probably because I didn't notice he was there."

"Yea, well, he took pictures and stuff, and I think you were in a few of them. Only I'm not sure he hadn't recognized you, or he might've said something."

Rianna glanced at Regulus sharply. "What do you mean 'he might've said something'?"

"Well, y'know," Reg said vaguely. "Stuff. Like how he's always saying stuff to you now."

"Ugh!" Rianna narrowed her eyes, annoyed that Sirius dare have the balls to mention her at home, too. That infuriating little- turd! He probably said a whole slew of mean things to Regulus about her. Turning to said younger Black, she patted his hand, "Well, you just put everything he says right out of your mind, k?"

He shrugged, "Whatever. He says little enough to me, as it is."

"How fortunate you are. Well, lavender dress robes it is, then. Hey, can you iron them for me?"

Regulus wrinkled his face, "Gross, what do I look like- a house-elf?"

"C'mon!"

"No way, I don't even iron my own robes."

In the end Rianna did her own robes, but she didn't care too much, still buoyed by her good mood and expectations for the evening. She hung them carefully in her wardrobe as soon as she finished and glanced around the seventh year girl's dormitory. Noticing a thin book on her bedside table, she picked it up and glanced at the cover. _Seductive Witches Throughout History_. She rolled her eyes, tucked it under her arm and headed for the common room.

"Hey Reg," she called out to him as she covered the steps, "I'm taking your little porno down to the library, I'm sure they're missing it over there." The poor boy almost ripped the essay he was trying to roll up in half and was quickly turning a bright shade of red under the few titters aimed at him. Luckily, not many people were in the common room at the time. Most were either preparing for later or hanging out elsewhere. Waving cheerily, she exited the portal that lead to the rest of the castle.

As soon as her feet had touched ground, she was summoned by a pair of familiar voices. Severus Snape and Lucious Malfoy were walking towards her, both smirking. "What's this we're hearing, Fey?" Lucious asked, raising an eyebrow.

"What?" the woman replied. She didn't know what it was, but there was always something about the handsome, pale haired Slytherin addressing her that put her on her guard. She was on better terms with Severus. They weren't best buddies or anything, but at least they could hold civil discussions and spirited debates. She just wished he'd take all her hints of shampoos and soaps that she'd given as Christmas presents.

"_You_ are going to the dance with _Lupin_?" He seemed on the verge of laughter. "Just when we thought you couldn't disgrace the name of Slytherin any more." He shook his head. "You really do exceed expectations."

As Malfoy climbed into the portal behind the shield, Severus chuckled humorlessly, "Fey and Lupin...a likely match!"

Glancing to make sure Malfoy's rear end was well past hearing distance, Rianna returned with, "A lot more likely than Snap and Evans!" She felt immediately a bit bad about saying that- not many people knew about Severus's infatuation, but he really shouldn't have opened his trap. His look of shock and slight hurt was quickly replaced with a scowl.

"Whatever, I'm over that mudblood since ages ago."

"Un-huh." She continued on her way, leaving Snape to crawl into the common room, fuming.

Less than halfway down to the library, a much less pleasant surprise was meandering towards her. _This is really going to suck,_ Rianna thought, steeling herself for yet another Black Encounter. He already knew about her date with Remus and most likely he would use the otherwise empty corridors to make some _really_ snide remarks.

As the two drew closer together, she saw him open his mouth, glance down then a grin covered his face. "Hey, I've been looking for that book!" he said, whipping it out of her hands without so much as a preamble. He riffled through it's pages as his grin widened, "Yeeeaaa... Anyhow, I didn't realize you were into women, too. Is that why you're taking Remus today? Cuz that's a low blow, that really is, and I will fully tell him about your devious plot."

"Ugh, disgusting," Rianna declared, turning up her nose and ignoring the bulk of what the other had said. "Oh, and you touched it, you return it!" she added, turning on her heels and skipping away as quickly as possible. Halfway down the corridor she added over her shoulder, "It's your little brothers, so if you don't, the bills still coming to YOUR house!" Black seemed too engrossed in the new literary find to take much notice of her words.

Rounding the corner, the as-yet-raven haired one ran smack into none other than Remus Lupin. "Hi," she said, smiling and rubbing her smarting nose simultaneously. The sharp pain had brought tears to her eyes and put her to wondering just how much Remus could probably lift with pecs as hard as those. Since this information only made her blush, she decided she'd file it away for some boring History of Magic lesson later.

Remus, not knowing he might be mentally stripped at any given moment, however, smiled and apologized. "I was actually looking for you," he said.

"Oh, really? Uh, what for?"

"Um...I actually had something to tell you. It's- it's better if we met up some place-" Catching sight of an empty classroom, he motioned for her to follow him inside. Foregoing the lights, he sat in a chair near the door where minimal light still streamed through and she perched on the desk. He took a deep breath and started what looked like a prepared schpeel.

"Well see, the thing is...to be brutally honest here, when you asked me a few days ago, I was- well, I tried to tell you the truth in that I'm really not comfortable, with my, uh, various handicaps, and dances and such, but since you insisted it wasn't a problem, I agreed. In reality, I was kind of in shock that anyone had asked me at all, and jumped on the opportunity. So-"

"So you mean that someone better has asked you and you'd rather go with them?" Rianna asked matter-of-factly, hiding her crestfallen feelings.

"What? No, no, no, it's not that. It's just that I didn't want to accidentally lead you on. I'd be happy to escort you to the dance tonight, that's not a problem. I just don't want you to accidentally get the impression that this is a longterm thing," Remus finished uncomfortably.

Rianna tilted her head in thought, relieved and curious. "Cool, that's fine with me. Like I said before, it's just a dance, not a wedding proposal." He grinned, apparently happy that she was taking it so well and that he'd managed to explain it fairly accurately.

"Can I ask you something?"

Their gazes locked and he knew instinctively what she was going to question. "You probably shouldn't."

"What're you hiding?" she countered, quick enough that he knew she was anticipating his lack of cooperation.

"We all have our secrets to hide, Rianna. Isn't that enough?"

"Secrets are easiest when secrets are shared."

"Always?" He smiled and got up as she thought on that. "Thanks for letting me off the hook easily and y'know, understanding and everything. Was nice verbally sparring with you as well- I don't believe I'll be doing it again though. You're a much sharper opponent than some of my mates." He gave her a small salute and left.

* * *

Sirius flipped another page. Initially, when he saw Fey, he'd been intending to apologize to her for his thick-headedness. She really had been tutoring Regulus and he was improving for it. He figured, it was probably the least he could do and if he seriously intended to get his head out of his ass, there was hardly a better first step. But after confiscating her book, he'd kinda forgotten about that.

He'd been skimming the book (or the pictures, really) as he made his slow way to the library. It was an old book and for sure standards of beauty had changed quite a bit over time. Still, some of the witches weren't too shabby...Cleopatra, for instance, was a bombshell, and Morgan Le Fey had a fire about her- literally. From the picture, it was easy to tell where the current Fey learned to set her hair on fire all the time. And that Murasaki Shikibu- even with the white paint on her face. However, Black did an anti-Ooh-la-la at Madame Curie!

The next picture after the lowly-rated Madame Curie's, however, was partially blocked by a bit of parchment. It appeared to be a list of sorts- well, two lists, actually...

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Waaah, writing the interactions between the Marauders is always so fun!! -does a fangirly squee- Ahem, okay, I'm fine. Seriously. Anyhow, please please please review and tell me what YOU thought of the chapter! Thanks! -smilie-


	10. Fantastic Feasts and How To Have Them

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ah, fourth LONG chapter in a row since my year or so hiatus and I've got only ONE REVIEW since my mad updating spree (thanks baiser.moi). T.T And still I update...

EDIT: It was "in a row" back when I first started it. Sorry...

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life**

**Chapter 10: Fantastic Feasts and How To Have Them**

Sirius Black stood at the top of the tallest tower of Hogwarts, bright scarlet envelope in hand, taking in the beautiful evening landscape. He'd long since learned that this was the safest route to take to avoid a burning humiliation and deep resentment. The envelope had started smoking from the ends, Sirius dropped it on the ledge, sitting down with his back against the circular wall, hands clapped over his ears in anticipation.

A minute or so later, he removed his hands from around his ears. They were ringing in the sudden absence of sound. Yup, it was always the same. _"Blood traitor...filth...disgrace to the name of Black..."_ the list went on. He could still remember the first Howler his mum had sent him. That was, perhaps, the most hurt he'd ever felt- or remembered feeling, at any rate. That was also when his perceptions of his loving mum first changed into the truth he'd come to realize.

He had written home excitedly the _night of_ the Sorting Ceremony, unable to wait till morning before ringing in the good news to his mum that his fears really had been baseless. They weren't going to turn him away at the doors or, as cousin Andromeda had told him, make him do complex magics to test his worthiness. He'd been sorted into Gryffindor House, and lots of people had cheered for him. Scrawling a quick note in the haphazard penmanship of an eleven year old, he sent the owl he'd received as a present straight back home.

Two days later, to his confusion, it returned during breakfast in the Great Hall with a bright scarlet envelope tied to its legs. Everyone had stared, knowing that someone was going to be in for it. So it was impossible to NOT have been the talk of the next few days. The contents always read the same. He was suddenly a blood traitor, filthy scum, smearing the name of the honorable house of his birth. It appeared that suddenly, by being sorted into Gryffindor, he had committed some sort of crime that warranted immediate removal of all loving feelings from his mother.

That time, the shock had overridden his instincts to run and he'd sat there dumbfounded as she verbally whipped him. But he was no longer eleven and he no longer made such mistakes. He was fairly clear on the timing now. Usually she sent him these little reminders when she felt he'd be most humiliated, Halloween, Valentine's Day, September 1, his birthday, any day that there were likely to be lots of students to hear her and jeer at him later. But he'd figured her out.

So this was the best way he'd found, through trial and error. The height of the Astronomy tower ensured that most of her vocals were lost by the time they hit the grounds.

Stretching, he turned, sweeping the charred remains of the Howler into his palm. He sat on his knees, arms pillowing his head as he stared out over the grounds, Hagrid's hut, the lake, the Forbidden Forest, and over in the distance, Hogsmeade. He felt unusually deep in thought once again, and wondered what might've triggered these weird moods.

He thought about this being his last year at Hogwarts. He'd be on his own, after this. Where would he wind up? What about his friends? Remus was likely to get far in life, he was already mentally stable. He'd left the trappings of youth behind him soon after he'd been bitten, but he knew what kind of man he was. He knew his limits and what he wanted and there was just an aura of stability around him. It felt like he was already a man while they were still struggling to become so.

But even James was further along the road than he, Sirius was. As soon as Lily gave him the green light, they were going to get married and pop out little Potter Jrs. at the speed of light, he knew. The private joke made him chuckle, some. Yea, James would probably be 99 before he died, with a dozen kids and fifty thousand grand children. That oughta make him happy. And again there was the striking difference between James and Sirius: even though James wasn't above a prank or detention, he knew what he wanted from life (Lily), and where he wanted to go from there (marriage, kids, grandkids, the works).

Sirius Black would be an orphan, for all intents and purposes, after his stint at Hogwarts. Sure his grades were stellar, but who'd hire a wizard with a problem history longer than the Hogwarts Express? Plus there was the taboo of being shunned from an ancient and most noble house. Whatever the aura around the Blacks, theirs was still an old and respected house which commanded the ears of many important witches and wizards. _Why_ did it mean so much to his Mum that he be a Slytherin? It was just a house. That didn't necessarily mean he'd end up like the rest of the family...she'd always joked (back when she was still lighthearted with him) that he was a softie. What made her think his Hogwarts House would change that?

Thinking on these things, Sirius admitted privately to himself that it was kind of a big deal that Fey was relatively okay. After all, she had Snape and Lucious in all her classes, in her dorm and at her table in the Great Hall. She still wasn't as bad as them, whatever he tried to make her out as. He really needed to get his act together- what prompted him to pick on her so much? He sighed and glanced down to where the book from earlier lay, with the bit of parchment placed on top of it.

She seriously thought him unpleasant enough to consider not going with Remus because of their friendship. He smirked. Well, no one could say he didn't leave an impression, eh? Getting up and dusting himself off, he opened the book at random, intending to stick the parchment in there for safekeeping until such time as he saw Fey again, but the heading caught his eye.

WHAT DID THESE WITCHES HAVE?

The witches featured in this book were not good girls. Nor were they inherently evil. It is all good and well to be either of the two, however, what these witches commanded was a respect- from wizards particularly. Not only because of their physical beauty, but their resilience and determination to never back down from a challenge. Furthermore, their determination to never be intimidated, least of all by wizards. There is something that wizards find irresistible in this. Perhaps it is from the thrill of chasing a witch he can never truly catch- particularly in regards to mental prowess-

Sirius found himself reading and feeling decidedly hot under the proverbial collar for some reason. What was this- a book from the loony bin? Still, he couldn't keep himself from reading the paragraph over, twice, and then the last few sentences again. The description certainly reminded him of someone in particular, but he felt certain that he was not "chasing" said witch. Certain. Something nagged in the back of his head and he returned to his perch to clear his head and leave no doubts.

"Okay," he voiced aloud. "According to this here queer book, the witches weren't good girls- well, duh, she didn't stick through her detention, and I caught her in the kitchens that one time... Let's see...'nor were they inherently evil'- ha! She soo is!"

_Weren't you just thinking about how no, she's really not earlier?_ his brain reminded him.

"Ughh!" he groaned. He quickly glanced at the next section- respect commanding. Well, he certainly didn't respect her! So that was that.

_What do you call wanting to thank her for tutoring Regulus? You thank people often, do you?_

Grrr...his mind was really pushing his buttons. "What's next already? Hm...'Not only'...hm...'physical beauty'...err...right." He could just hear his brain smirking. "Whatever- next! Resilience and determination...well, she's got enough of that to fill a hippogriff! Damn it all if she doesn't act like she could care less about my jinxing skills, too. Brain, this is not looking too good now, is it?"

_No, you dumb bloke, it doesn't. But it all really just depends on your perspective._

"She's Slytherin, remember?"

_It's kind of disgusting that you, of all people, have been harping on about this from day one, isn't it?_

Sirius didn't answer himself, or challenge the rest of the paragraph, but he and his head both knew he didn't have to. Some things were becoming clearer but he wasn't sure he wanted them to be. "Y'know, it was a lot easier when I just picked on her for being Slytherin."

_Everything's easier before you grow up_, his mind remarked sagely.

* * *

It was a decidedly different Sirius Black that sat down to breakfast that morning. There was no hefty grin on his face, he seemed determined to win a staring contest with his porridge, and he hadn't said a word to any of his friends beyond "Morning".

"Sirius is being weird again," Pettigrew noted through his third glass of pumpkin juice. At the mention of his name, Black blinked and looked up. He seemed to remember something off hand and turned to Remus.

"You get those robes ironed out again?"

"Hm? Oh, yea, why?"

"No reason. I would've done them if you hadn't."

Remus lifted an eyebrow. "Oh yea?"

"Yea."

"Cool."

They returned to their meal, although the werewolf cast several side long glances at his friend and exchanged a few with Potter. There was definitely something up with their mate, but Lupin wasn't sure it was an entirely bad thing. After all, it may just be that Black had finally (against all bets) hit his mental growth spurt, and his brain was now calculating things like other people's feelings into it's previously limited scope of consideration. As Black deftly grabbed the Prophet out of Pettigrew's grasp and turned to the comics section, Lupin reminded himself it was best not to hope too much too soon.

Breakfast was thus a relatively quiet affair. As everyone began to evacuate the Great Hall, Sirius glanced across the room to where someone was gathering her things up. "I'll catch up with you guys in a bit," he told his friends, then made his way through the crowds to the Slytherin end.

She wasn't expecting anybody, so as she swung her messenger bag over her shoulder, she turned swiftly and nearly ran into Black. Stumbling back slightly, she glanced up at him briefly.

"Hi," he said. He was feeling a tad more nervous than he let on, although that could've been his body's natural reflex to being surrounded by so many Slytherins at one time. She frowned an eyebrow at him and moved to pass him up. He moved with her, blocking her.

* * *

Rianna let out a mental sigh. He just kept getting weirder, didn't he? She looked down and decided the fastest way to end this and get to her dorm to get ready would be to play along. Honestly, he was like some little, spoiled brat. "What do you want?" she asked him.

"Nothing, I just thought maybe we should start over."

"Okay." She looked over his shoulder- partly to indicate that she felt the conversation was very much over and partly to assess whether she might make a run for it after all. There was a slight, frustrating pause. "Well?"

"Well what?"

"Well, what're you here for? Shouldn't you be wreaking havoc on some innocent kids or something? Preferably somewhere blissfully far away from the dungeons?"

"Don't worry- it's on my to-do list." He grinned and pocketed his hands casually. He looked for all the world as though he fully expected to spend a nice chatty evening delaying her. Maybe that was his plan- he'd make her super late and then she'd have puffy red eyes or bad hair or...or wrinkly robes or something. Lame as it sounded, she felt if he was desperate enough, he just might.

"Ahem, speaking of lists..." he trailed as he pulled out a bit of parchment from his robes. "I thought maybe you might be missing this." He handed her the slip of paper and his eyes were laughing at him much more than his grin.

She gave the paper a cursory glance and then did a double take. Her mouth nearly fell open and her heart rate sped up. How on earth did Black, of all people, manage to get his hands on this specific list? A list she'd made randomly and hardly remembered until now. Did every embarrassing thing truly have to happen to her?

"I thought it was pretty funny," Black commented, in an offhand sort of way. She really didn't need this right now.

Gritting her teeth, she attempted a strained sort of smile. "Oh really? Well it's just a list, nothing overly hilarious." She crumpled it roughly in her hand and shoved it into her bag.

"Yea, but it's a pretty particular list, isn't it? You do that for every little thing you're going to do?" He laughed as he infuriatingly fell into step beside her. He mimed writing in the air, "'Reasons _to_ use the bathroom'...-"

"Ugh- you are so _crude!_" the firewitch shot at him as he laughed at his own joke.

"Yea, but I'm pretty funny too, eh?"

"No, you're not!"

"Well, I must be pretty _something_, you mentioned me what- three times on your list?"

She'd mentioned him four times, actually, but there was no way she'd be the one to tell him that. "You are _something_, but it isn't funny. It's obnoxious, immature, arrogant and great big prat. Good day." She turned down the last hall and climbed up into the entrance behind the shield, huffy and not in the good mood she'd hoped to be in.

* * *

Sirius nearly laughed as he watched Fey's retreating back. This was almost more fun than being a jerk. He had intended to apologize (again), but decided to go easy on himself- even holding a jinx-free conversation with Slytherin was kind of a big deal for him.

As he was returning to the Gryffindor common room, he passed his cousin, Bellatrix. The girl had a firmly cold look planted on her face, and this was partly due to their mutual disdain, but it was also partly for the benefit of the two friends that flanked her.

The male Black grinned. "Yoo hoo! Cousin Bellatrix!" He force-fed as much enthusiasm as he could, just for the sheer pleasure of her infuriation. He noted delightedly that his cousin's hand was straying quite welcomingly closer to her pocket, and there were a set of jinxes Sirius was itching to use on her.

"Why look, it's the lesser Black," a blonde, curly-haired friend tittered.

Sirius pulled his wand out at the same instant that he glanced condescendingly at the girl. He knew if Bellatrix thought his attention were misplaced for even a half-second, she'd waste no time in exploiting the opportunity.

The jets of light bounded off one another, the walls and random suits of armor. The headache-induced cacophony that followed would bring Filtch running. Being an exceptionally gifted student had its perks. For example, Sirius had long since mastered nonverbal spells, while average students like Bellatrix were only beginning to practice them.

As his venomous cousin emerged from behind one of her friends, whom she'd used as a human shield, Sirius hit her with one of his recently favorite spells. Immediately, Bellatrix's feet were swept from under her and pulled into the air as though by invisible ropes. She shrieked and dropped her wand, frantically trying to keep her robes from sliding right off her head. Her friends, though helping, were trying not to laugh at the spectacle themselves.

Sirius had no such manners, himself. He stared openly at Bellatrix hanging upside down, virtually in her underwear and laughed until he nearly cried.

"SIRIUS!" Bellatrix shrieked. "I swear- one day, I'm going to watch you die!"

The one addressed shrugged. "You can watch me in the loo, for all I care, cousin," he answered. "As long as I'm laughing my arse off while it happens, it'll be time well spent." As Filtch's wheezing and yelling grew louder, Sirius skipped away from the scene. Bellatrix's mates were quick to follow his example.

Smiling in satisfaction, Black gave the fat lady the password thinking thinking if Bellatrix and Snape got together, they could do a great many things upside down.

Disappointingly enough, a very tame and G-rated game of Exploding Snap was being carried out by Remus and Peter in the crowded common room. James was haphazardly scrawling something on a length of parchment looking none too happy.

"Homework?" Sirius asked politely.

James scowled. "Hardly. Eleven inches of lines because I laughed at your cheek in Muggle Studies. Honestly is that even allowed?"

The raven-haired youth patted his friend's shoulder. "Don't worry. Stuff like that won't be happening much now."

James rolled his eyes. "Highly unlikely. Ugh! I'm writing as big as I can without looking like I am. Hey, think she'll notice?"

While Sirius examined the lettering, the card castle on the next table exploded spectacularly, cutting Peter's eyebrow and nicking everyone else in the vicinity.

"It's fine, Prongs," Sirius commented, tossing the parchment aside, having just been hit with a brilliant idea. "Hey, let's celebrate Moony's final days as a man with a little Strip Goldfish!" he announced to the room at large. The other marauders, as well as the rest of the fairly packed common room raised their eyebrows, glancing at Remus in concern.

"Er, has he decided to switch teams, then?" Candace Dottry, a sixth year, laughed.

Remus sighed. He thought that perhaps even without lycanthrophy, his chances of a relationship would still be slim to none. With friends as tactfully flattering as his... But no matter, Sirius was explaining his weird self.

All eyes were on Sirius (as they usually were) as he replied, "Who knows- with all the attention he'll be receiving from the ladies, he may well have to resort to it."

"Sirius, if this is about Rianna, I already told you, we're only dates for the evening, it's nothing serious."

"Ah, yes, my friend, so one would _think_," Padfoot began wisely, slinging an arm around Remus's neck. "But you see, as soon as word gets out that good old Lupin is on the market, you're going to be swarmed with offers and yummy chocolates." As the room laughed and Remus rolled his eyes, Sirius continued, adopting a high, breathy voice and hanging on to Remus's neck with both arms. "Have you seen his gorgeous eyes? They're so sad and _deep_ yet still piercing- what a sex bomb!"

Remus shoved Sirius away, scowling slightly. "You know it's really disturbing that you can say these things with a straight face and think of them so quickly."

"Think of them?! Nonono, dear Remus, these horrendous words are not the lovechild of _my_ thoughts. You see, I have eyes. No, these traumatizing tidbits are things I'm forced to hear on an increasingly frequent basis from girls in every year." Frowning, he added, "I'm starting to think they do it near me on purpose, hoping I'll drop you hints- ...Oh. Duh."

"Oh, knock if off, Sirius, seriously."

"Oh, hey, there she is- look! You can ask her yourself right now! Hey little girl! Did you or did you not moon over Remus's eyes?" he inquired of someone over Remus's shoulder. The girl let out a squeal and raced up the girl's dormitory, face covered in her hands. Remus caught a glimpse of honey blonde hair before she disappeared behind a slammed door.

The poor werewolf raised his hands in a sign of submission and announced for the record that he never took anything Padfoot said seriously. "And now I, for one, am going to the library." Mustering up the remains of his dignity, he strode purposefully to the portrait hole and disappeared behind it.

"Well," Sirius yawned. "That's no fun. I'm going to bed."

"Didn't you just wake up about an hour ago?" James demanded.

"Yea. But a man needs his energy, you know. Plus if I end up stuck with Filtch, you _know_ what that does to a person." He desperately hoped he wouldn't have to help Filtch. Sometimes, Sirius thought that perhaps the old caretaker had really gone 'round the bend. At any given detention, Sirius might look up, only to find his every action observed closely by a pair of fanatically gleaming orbs. Maybe he'd drop Dumbledore a few hints about having him replaced.

When Sirius dropped heavily on to the scarlet sheets of his four-poster, it was to deeper thoughts than Filtch's fanaticism. Instead, he mused on the coming holidays. He'd like nothing better than to take the Express straight to the Potters', but he knew his mum always had that welcoming banquet the day after. Every bloody Slytherin would be invited to that horrible affair. It would be the nightmare of nightmares. He wasn't fool enough to miss it- at least not until he was properly finished with school.

Sirius sighed and turned over, eventually drifting off to a light nap.

* * *

"For the millionth time, Moony, you look absolutely spiffy. Now, if you'd kindly move away from the portrait hole, we can all proceed as planned." The three marauders filed solemnly out of the Gryffindor common room: Remus in his worn, gray dress robes- immaculately pressed; James in his bottle green ones; and Peter in his slightly wrinkled blue ones.

"So, you never mentioned you had a date," Moony commented, glancing sidelong at Prongs as they made their way to the Entrance Hall. "And what's with the green robes?"

"I wanted to be open in case Lily changed her mind. And I got these robes specially for the occasion. See, they're the same color as her eyes. They'd totally accentuate how beautiful they are when we stand next to each other."

"You're a lost cause, mate," Remus assured his obsessive friend. "Who's she going with?"

"Pfft, ionno, some Chester Pharlan."

"Chester Pharlan? Who's that?"

"Pssh...how do you expect me to know? Some sixth year from Ravenclaw. About this high-" he indicated the general region of his nose- "dirty blond hair, ugly blue eyes, walks around looking like he's permanently sun burned."

"Tsk, tsk. You're slacking off. Don't you know his blood type and birthday yet?"

"Type O, February 22."

"I was being sarcastic."

"..."

As Remus walked down the stairs, his eyes roved the multicolored crowd for Rianna, but as he didn't know what she was wearing, he had to wait for her to wave him over. He had to admit, she cleaned up impressively.

Her (currently) black hair was piled on the back of her head in a would-be messy know, except it looked elegant. The hair itself looked damp, although he was sure it wasn't. Her asymmetrically colored eyes were lined heavily, but extremely tastefully in black liner, which tapered gracefully in the direction of her temples. It gave her a very catty look.

The lavender dress robes had floral embroidery in a darker hue cascading diagonally from one shoulder down to her waist. The same pattern was repeated at the long, tapering cuffs of her sleeves. The material was such that it accentuated all the right places and the full, flowing skirt of the robes moved pleasantly when she walked.

"Wow! You look- am-amazing, really!" Remus exclaimed, truly meaning the words.

She grinned and ducked her head. "I don't clean up half bad, do I? And might I say that you cut a dashing figure yourself? Excellent color, that steel gray." She nodded like a fashion guru passing judgment.

Just then a relatively gloomy James stopped dead in his tracks. "Whoa." He gave Rianna a quick once over, then raised his eyebrows appreciatively at Remus. "Lucky, lucky..." Remus sighed, although he did feel secretly pleased at his having somehow acquired such an attractive date.

"Shall we?" he asked, extending his arm to the young firewitch, who smiled and accepted. More than a few heads turned or did double takes as the pair walked into the Great Hall.

Lupin had anticipated escorting Rianna to the Slytherin table. However, instead of the typical house tables, plush picnic tables had been set up in varying seating options from two to a table to a maximum of eight. He lead her to a table for two near the perimeter and helped her to her seat before seating himself.

* * *

Rianna felt like a million galleons. She couldn't keep herself from grinning like an idiot. The stress of school was melting away. Annoying persons were kept at bay, the sky in the Great Hall was an enchantingly clear fantasy, the house elves had outdone themselves in the kitchens, Remus looked like an incredibly handsome gentleman and was a great conversationalist. Things really couldn't get any better.

"So I was reading this book a while ago, and apparently, there's a roaring black market of sham wizarding goods sold to muggles."

"Oh yea? How does that work out?"

"Well, remember that television thing we just learned about?" When Remus nodded, she continued. "Some wizards make these products, charm them, then have people demonstrate them in the television. But of course, the charms are either temporary, or only placed on the demo items."

The werewolf laughed and finished, "So that when the poor muggles order the items, they don't actually work as advertised. Sad story."

"It actually sounded pretty funny to me."

"Speaking of television, how exactly do they get themselves in there without magic? They're tiny box-type things, aren't they?"

"Yea...you know, I really don't know." Beat. "It may have something to do with wires," she concluded confidently.

Remus laughed. "_Everything_ muggle has to do with wires! Excellent insight there."

Rianna chuckled, "Ah, well...it was worth a try. There was always the chance you don't pay attention in Muggle Studies."

It was nearing the end of the feast when Remus cleared his throat slightly. "Ahem. So, ah, Rianna, what're you doing over the holiday?"

She sighed. "Bleh, absolutely nothing. I bum out at home and mum always ropes me into cleaning house with her. The greatest adventure of my holidays is avoiding that fate." She pulled a face to show what she thought of the prospect.

"You know, if you'd like, I'd love to meet over breaks and such."

"Mmm?" Rianna asked coyly, wiggling her eyebrows. "ReemyWeemy, is that a date I hear?"

He laughed lightheartedly and shook his head slightly, "Noo..." The thousand floating candles really sparkled in his eyes as he glanced at her. She reflected that perhaps she'd never seen him look quite this happy before. He was always politely mild about everything.

"In the interests of our new found friendship and your sanity, I must accept the invite," she proclaimed grandly.

"Ah, but will you toast to it?" he wanted to know, lifting his goblet of pumpkin juice in question. They clinked and drank down the cool concoction.

Rianna was feeling quite grown up. The food was starting to disappear and soft music wafted down from the transparent ceiling. "Hey, wanna dance?" she asked as the tables began to glide against the walls.

"Err, I have a confession to make."

"You can't dance?" she guessed.

"Correct."

"Men always think it's a big deal or something. Trust me- it's like the easiest thing in the world. Especially slow dancing. You just revolve slowly on the spot, most of the time."

"Can we wait until the dance floor is a tad crowded first?" A slight, anxious note rang in his voice, endearingly.

"Sure, sure," Rianna assured him.

So they waited. And waited. It seemed no one wanted to be the first ones. The teachers glanced around nervously near the front, perhaps feeling they should lead by example and not wanting to. Dumbledore had his eyes closed, passive smile on his face as he enjoyed the pleasant music.

An irritated voice raised itself from near the doors. "Well, this kinda sucks, doesn't it?" Murmurs ran through the assembled crowd- there were about twenty teachers here! The crowd parted to reveal a bored looking (of course) Sirius Black.

He strode through the crowd, grabbed a girl at random away from her date and declared, "And now, Candace- we dance!" Rianna noted through her surprise that the girl looked _quite_ flattered. She looked over at her date, shrugged and motioned to Sirius as though to say, "Well- it's Sirius Black! Sorry."

Black immediately swung her around, clasping her close enough that certain teachers pursed their lips and glanced away. From this vantage point, Sirius looked straight into the pleasantly shocked Candace's eyes and let out a sex purr. (A/N: Okay, everyone knows exactly what I'm talking about ;))

The room erupted into scandalous laughter, with various students checking to see how the teachers reacted. The shocked expression on Candace's face was only surpassed by the redness of her face. Sirius himself couldn't keep from laughing out loud. In this state, he began an obnoxiously quick cheek-to-cheek trot, which of course, sent everyone (including the dancing pair), into renewed fits of laughter.

By the time they'd dance-trotted up to the teachers' end, turned illegally sharply and dance-trotted back down to their starting point, they were doubled up in laughter. Black generously returned Candace to her date with an impressive bow, then scanned the room.

Rianna felt her sides seize up, and she covered her stomach with her hands as though to keep it from exploding. Beside her, Remus was in a similar state of helplessness, doubled over with his hands on his knees. It was strange, but she was actually glad that Black was here- this could be a record.

The firewitch thought he'd be hard pressed to outdo himself after _that_ spectacle, but she thought wrong. Black looked around the Great Hall, did a double take and grinned.

The students immediately glanced in the direction Sirius was now striding towards and gasped collectively. Rianna felt her eyes widen. "He wouldn't," she intoned firmly.

"Merlin's Beard, Sirius!" Remus moaned quietly, knowing his mate much better than Rianna. He let his face drop into his hand, but quickly lifted it again, eager to see how this would turn out.

"The reason I think muggles invented telephones and televisions to pass the time," Sirius began dramatically, falling to one knee before the Muggle Studies professor. "Is because they don't have a beautiful woman such as yourself to dance with."

The room erupted in laughter, wolf whistles and many a "ooOOoooh's". The mortified Professor, for her part, blushed profusely, covered her mouth with her hands and shook her head, grinning like a schoolgirl.

In the next instant, she'd been swept off her feet by the scandalous student. With a nod from the highly amused headmaster, the music immediately became a boisterous waltz.

Rianna wasn't the only one who couldn't believe what'd just happened. "Good Lord, he's really done it this time!" Remus yelled in her ear over the noise of the students. But he was grinning and cheering no less than anyone else.

"See here, Black!" Professor McGonagall cut in sharply, giving Sirius a stern look. "You have a detention with me today, and I fully expect you to be there."

"Aw, no need to be jealous, Minerva!" Sirius laughed, as he and the Muggle Studies professor approached. Swinging one arm around her and the other around McGonagall, he added, "There's plenty of Sirius to go around."

"Merlin's. Pants."

Remus was right. Rianna believed- actually _believed_ that Professor McGonagall was having a heart attack. The shell shocked look on her face would have lead anyone to believe she were merely an upright corpse. If the sight of Black dancing with her anyway hadn't been so amusing, there would have been an absolute silence. As it were, none of the students had ever seen McGonagall perform a dip before (personally, if she hadn't seen it with her own eyes, Rianna would have said it was impossible).

Dumbledore tapped Sirius on the shoulder as he came up from said dip. "May I cut in?" he asked, blue eyes shining in a way that suggested he hadn't enjoyed himself so much in a looong time.

"Certainly," Black replied and twirled her into Dumbledore's arms. Nearby students could hear her fighting for coherence and spluttering with an absolute loss for words. Giving the two authoritative figures a wide berth, the rest of the student body blended onto the dance floor.

The music changed to something upbeat and Rianna turned eagerly to Remus, but he fidgeted with his robes and instead, complained that this wasn't a slow song and there was no way he was going to dance to it. "Oh, Remus- in light of our new found friendship! For the friendship!" she declared.

"Rianna, I don't think that's a good-"

"Okay, you can't look any more ridiculous than Black," she pointed out to her date for the evening. At his defeated look, the firewitch added, "You dance now and I will acquiesce to one of your demands as well. Then we'll be even, right?" The werewolf shrugged, grinned and let himself be lead away.

In all truthfulness he really didn't do much but stand around and maybe sway a little bit, bob his head a bit here and there, throughout that particular number. He tried to discreetly glance around at how the other males were handling it and found, to his relief, that few were better off than he was. There seemed to be a silent, mutual agreement between all of them that this was a torture they just had to put up with. Occasionally, two males would catch sight of each other, both feeling equally ridiculous in the position they found themselves. A curt nod of understanding was all that was necessary.

The only guys that seemed to be enjoying themselves were doing things that Remus would never even consider- not in a million years. For example, Remus noted with some level of concern that that was the second time Chester Pharlan had attempted to pull his date, Lily, to him from behind and rub his midsection against her. Remus almost felt like dying of embarrassment just from watching- where did that pimply weirdo get the courage to do something so bold?

Lily frowned and shoved him aside roughly, but Remus wondered if he'd gotten the point or not.

Rianna caught sight of something and nudged Remus, pointing with her eyebrows. Glancing up, Remus grinned as he watched a furious looking McGonagall drag a protesting Sirius Black out of the Great Hall. "That's too bad," the girl noted. "He's the one that started up the party, after all."

"Want something to drink?" Remus asked hopefully.

Rianna laughed, "Not particularly, but if you really want to use the excuse, go ahead." He smiled a thank you and headed towards the refreshments table.

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I actually had most of this done a looong while ago, but the ending needed a little bit of work and plus, I'd lost motivation. I still haven't gotten reviews T.T Pwease...help this starving author! (I'm starving for reviews, btw XD) Also, there's definitely more to the dance and all but this was already getting super long, and I decided to split up the whole day into separate chapters. Review and the next one will hopefully come out sooner!


	11. Stupid Pervs and How To Stop Them

AUTHOR'S NOTE: And here, we continue the funfest!

* * *

**A Paradoxical Life**

**Chapter 10: Stupid Pervs and How To Stop Them**

Remus Lupin was glad Rianna wasn't forcing him to stick around when he was clearly feeling awkward. Most others were not so lucky. _Then again,_ Remus thought , walking over curiously to an incredibly gloomy James. _At least I have a date. _Poor Potter. Lupin guessed Lily was not, in fact open enough to save him a dance.

His friend's face was decorated with a deep scowl and empty cups littered the table top where he sat. Only other wallflowers gravitated to that area, and even they gave him a wide berth. James was not giving off overly friendly vibes.

His fan club wasn't even asking for any dances- that in itself spoke volumes. Remus shook his head and imagined what must have befallen the first poor girl that had been brave enough to approach the moping young man. He took an empty seat next to his friend and waited in companionable silence.

"He's been incredibly bold, all night, the git," James informed him presently. His eyes were fixed on a specific point on the dance floor and his scowl deepened according to the events taking place. Remus craned his neck, trying to see, but the dancing bodies of students kept getting in the way. He expected Prongs was probably overreacting.

Suddenly, James stood up, his lips curling into a snarl and ran after someone. Alarmed, Remus shot up in hot pursuit, hoping James wasn't going to land himself into trouble and wondering what it was that had set him off this time.

* * *

Rianna was just beginning to think she'd done enough solo dancing for now when someone pushed her violently aside. "Hey!" she demanded angrily, ready to give the jerk a piece of her mind. She caught sight of Lily's receding red hair and a half second later, an angry looking Pharlan followed her. Well, that was all good and well. Lily was a nice girl, but that did not give her Pushing and Shoving Rights over all others. "Like hell," Rianna muttered to herself as she stomped in their direction.

* * *

James burst out of the Great Hall mere seconds after Pharlan, nearly bowling him over, and thus Remus, in turn, nearly ran over James. Unbeknownst to any of the four gathered in the Entrance Hall, Rianna came up short behind Remus, breathing slightly heavily and wondering why so many people had simultaneously left the Great Hall in pursuit of each other. The answer came in the form of an angry outburst from Evans.

"Don't you dare touch me, Chester!"

The Ravenclaw boy who was directly behind Lily sneered and grabbed her wrist, forcibly stepping much closer to the redhead than she was clearly comfortable with. "Why should I? Is this a game to you, then, Lily, is it? Don't act so innocent, you want me to-"

A jet of yellow light struck Chester with a considerable amount of force, knocking him sideways into the marble staircase. An incensed James stood over him, the tip of his wand actually smoking from the violence with which he'd shot the spell. Everything about the seventh year roared with rage from the hatred in his eyes to the quivering hand which held his wand.

"Apologize," he snarled. The command was non-negotiable. Lily stood a short ways away, her mouth hanging open from the suddenness of it all, eyes darting from the sprawled and wheezing form of her date to the upright one of her benefactor.

It was clear that Chester was, in fact, trying to apologize, but his unfortunate run-in with the stairs had probably cracked a few ribs. The pain was preventing him from speaking correctly but this apparently did not go down in Potter's book as a viable excuse. He advanced on Pharlan purposefully.

"Whoa, mate, calm down," Remus advised, grabbing James from the back and pulling him in the opposite direction. "He needs to go to the hospital wing, you may've done some serious damage." The werewolf glanced around anxiously and his gaze landed on Rianna. He looked meaningfully at her, which she took to mean she was supposed to help him should he need it. The firewitch tried to crunch some quick numbers in her head about how many men it would take to subdue Potter, but to everyone's surprise, he took a step back of his own accord.

"Don't ever- EVER touch Evans again. Ever! Three feet of parchment on what makes you such a slimy git. You can work on it while you're in the hospital wing. Keep your hands off of her, or I'll be finishing what I just started." A vein was throbbing in Potter's jaw. It quieted as he glanced at Lily.

Suddenly, it seemed like the fire ran out of him. "Look, I'm sorry," he started, holding his hands up in defeat. "I just- I- I saw him and the whole night, he just," he made a face as though he'd just swallowed a lemon, "wouldn't keep his hands to himself and then just now-" He looked pleadingly at Lily.

For a few seconds, Rianna just stared in amazement the wonder that was James Potter. In one second, he'd turned from a blazing column of masculinity, doling out vigilante justice to perverts everywhere into a pleading, helpless, hurting puppy dog wanting so badly to be forgiven.

Lily's rejection of James was, by now, infamous throughout the school. Consequently, he was not the only one who was surprised when she said simply, "Thank you."

Incredulous and caught off gaurd, James could only stammer, "Of- of course. Anytime."

"I think I'm all funned out," Lily continued weakly. "Umm..." She glanced around at everyone assembled. "I'm sorry to have caused everyone all this commotion. Rianna, why are you here?"

"Oh, uh...well, if you must know, in your haste to leave, you accidentally shoved me rather forcefully." It sounded pretty stupid as she said it, considering that the haste was justified. It seemed rather base to admit she'd been meaning to give the shaken Evans a piece of her mind, so she improved a half-truth. "I came to see if everything was all right...you seemed upset...Pharlan seemed pissed..."

Lily nodded. "Thanks. I'm fine, really. Thanks to Potter." She glanced briefly at him, seeming not to notice his cheeks coloring slightly. "I think I'll just go to bed." She forced a small smile for everyone's benefit.

"What? No!" James objected. The others turned to stare at him. Due to a mutual, unspoken consent, everyone had decided to ignore Pharlan on the floor. "Don't go," James added softly, looking at the love of his life who had never given him the time of day. "Don't let him ruin your night, don't- ...don't let him get you down or- or make you cry or anything. It's his loss, not yours." He licked his lips nervously and continued. "Come back to the dance. Please."

Lily was looking uncomfortable and slightly embarrassed. "Really, Potter, I'm fine. My feet hurt from dancing, my shoes are a bit small, actually. I'm just tired." At his unconvinced look, she added, "_Really!_"

"Then don't dance," James switched to a different track. "Just sit....talk...eat, or something."

Lily closed her eyes, shaking her head slowly. "Look, Potter, I'm really grateful to you. I appreciate your championing me, but I don't think...that will..." she trailed away awkwardly, not knowing how to tell him to his face that his actions had not instantly warmed her heart to him. It was not that simple a thing to do, falling in love.

"No worries, then," James continued doggedly. "I understand. It won't mean anything, I promise. Can we just sit and talk? Evans, we've been in the same house, in almost all the same classes for _seven years_ now, and I still haven't called you by your first name out loud."

"...Out loud?" She quirked an eyebrow, the question hung, as though suspended between the years he had loved her, and she had brushed him aside.

James's mouth snapped shut abruptly and he turned a healthy shade of crimson. "Uh...you know."

Lily was suppressing a smile, looking around anywhere but at James. "Okay," she quipped then. "Alright Potter. No strings attached, right?"

He placed a hand over his heart and solemnly stated, "On my honor."

She smiled. "I'm Lily, by the way." She extended her hand. James was grinning from ear to ear. He grasped her hand so tenderly, Rianna was forced to look away, embarrassed. As he opened his mouth to make his own introductions, Lily interrupted him. "No need to ask who you are. Quidditch stars are pretty well-known." As his blush intensified and grin widened, Lily continued, almost laughing now. "The rumors about what you can do on a broomstick fly more fantastically than I imagine you do."

There was a decidedly unchaste twinkle in Potter's eye as he returned immediately with, "Oh, I don't know about that..." Then, as though remembering she thought him cocky, he added, "But you shouldn't pay much attention to rumors."

"Shouldn't I?" Lily was saying as the pair walked towards the Great Hall.

"No." he stated firmly. "What you _should_ do, is come watch a game and decide for yourself."

It was a grinning and easily chatting pair the doors of the Great Hall closed on. "Wow," Rianna said, looking around at the remaining two. "Just wow." She blinked a few times, then shook her head to clear it. Remus was grinning almost as much as James.

"What're YOU so happy about?" Rianna demanded.

"Nothing. It's just, those two..."

Rianna laughed. "I guess some people just can't escape themselves, huh?"

"Guess so."

A weird, gurgling noise brought them both back down to earth. Rianna wrinkled her nose. "Ugh, what do we do about _that?_" She kicked his foot, looking at him in disgust. Remus looked around the corridor, but no one showed up to cart him away.

"I suppose we should deposit him at the hospital wing..."

They wrestled a groaning and whining Chester Pharlan up, creating a kind of human cradle. Remus hefted his upper body awkwardly, trying not to rip out any more ribs, or hurt him too much, while Rianna awkwardly carried his feet, trying not to let his shoes muck up her pretty dress robes and afraid to take them off in case of any noxious fumes.

"Ugh, careful, careful," Pharlan wheezed desperately at Remus. "I think my shoulder's also probably broke- eurgh!"

Remus looked slightly worried, but Rianna kicked him swiftly in the back. "Shut up! Be thankful he's carrying you at all!" As they made their slow, unsteady way up to the hospital wing (which turned out to be a surprisingly long way away from the Great Hall), she was sure to voice all her frustrations with him out loud.

"Stupid git," she panted when they were more than halfway through their journey and had set him down for a quick break. Remus was massaging his back and Rianna bent backwards, trying to even out the strain on her spine. "Okay, ready," she said presently and they started up again.

When they finally reached the hospital wing, and chucked Pharlan unceremoniously onto an empty bed, Rianna stood over him, panting slightly and fixing him with an evil look. "You realize I'm missing the dance and the feast because of you? Because you couldn't keep it in your pants for two minutes? Horny pervert! I've a mind to beat out the remaining bones in your body as well. Hmph!" She glanced up to find the small, first year boy from across the room staring at her in wide eyed amazement. Rianna clamped her hands over her mouth, eyes darting to Lupin.

"What's he gone and done, then?" the boy inquired, nodding at Pharlan. "What didn't he keep in his pocket?"

She bit her tongue to keep from laughing out loud and said quickly, "His wand." Catching Remus's eye, she turned around quickly, not trusting herself to keep from bursting out laughing and was met with the sight of Sirius Black hunched over the patient in the next bed, feeding her something and muttering quietly.

"Black!" she said sharply, innuendos all but forgotten.

He glanced up, nodded briefly at her and returned to whatever he was doing. Odd behavior indeed, from one who would not pass up a chance to complicate a delicate situation.

"Are you force-feeding that poor girl something," she hissed, stepping closer with narrowed, suspicious eyes.

Behind her, Remus muttered softly, "Speaking of those who can't escape themselves..." His date spared a moment to roll her eyes at him, then returned to watching Black.

It was a curious sight, because while with one hand he was feeding her the potion, the other was softly stroking her hair. He straightened up only when the concoction was thoroughly drained and the girls sleepy eyes closed all the way. As he stepped away from the bed, her hand reached up and she murmured quietly, to which Sirius replied with quiet shushing sounds.

Taking the empty flask and tray by her bedside, Black turned and brusquely left for the back room. "What was that all about?" Rianna inquired, turning to look at Remus. He shrugged, his attentions spread across the various instruments of the room.

As Remus began to explain his fascination with the healing arts, voices drifted in from the back, getting louder as their occupants neared. "Mind you don't get into any more trouble now, Black," the nurse was saying. "You were a great help, as always." The two emerged from the back room, smiling.

"Not at all. This was loads easier than the usual," Black was saying.

"You can leave," the nurse said. "Enjoy what's left of the feast. Off you go now-" Her eyes fell on the newest charge and she frowned. "What's happened here?"

As Remus opened his mouth to explain, Rianna tapped his foot anxiously a number of times and he shut his mouth, glancing at her.

"He was at the bottom of the stairs outside the Great Hall, Madam," she started, with an straight face. "By the time we got to him, no one else was around." Which was true enough, in its own way. The nurse glanced sharply from Pharlan to Fey, weighing the story. "He must have had a nasty run-in with the stairs- marble's so unforgiving," she finished.

"Hmm...I suppose it is," the nurse said testily. A soft, discreet pinching of Pharlan's leg insured he nodded when the Madam turned to him.

"Oh, and I'm not sure why," Rianna spoke up again, cocking her head to the side in innocent curiosity. "But as we were bringing him up here, he kept insisting we give him three feet of parchment. Something about a homework assignment he absolutely had to turn in. He wouldn't stop crying until we assured him he'd get it in the hospital wing."

"Homework is not the priority right now," the nurse said with pursed lips. "But it will be seen to. Now you kids had best hurry or the dance will be over soon. Such dangerous things these children get up to these days..."

Remus and Rianna wasted no time in making themselves scarce. As soon as they had closed the door of the infirmary behind them, Remus turned, grinning to his date. "Marble is so unforgiving?"

The firewitch pretended to straighten out her skirts and tossed her hair. "Well, it is. Anyhow, Potter was doing the right thing- no sense in having him creamed for it."

"I was actually surprised he contained himself," Moony admitted.

"So James _did_ try to kill Evans's date, after all," Sirius noted. Rianna jumped slightly. She hadn't realized Black had been just behind them. "And _you_," he added, looking at Rianna. "Keeping his nose clean? I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself. Maybe you're not as bad as all that."

Rianna merely rolled her eyes and tossed her hair again. In lofty tones she intoned, "Yes, well, I'm not the only one full of surprises tonight, it would seem. That was quite the entrance, was it not?"

Sirius was always one to appreciate a well-deserved congratulatory comment. He grinned, and as the trio entered the Great Hall, it was plain that the festivities had not, in fact, died down. It had seemed to them as though a great deal of time had passed but as it turned out, the party was still in full swing. And it soon became apparent that the night, too, was not through with her surprises...

* * *

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Wow, updated after so long! I hope my early readers are still with me and forgive me for the long lapses between updates! T.T


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